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3.39 AVERAGE
3.39 AVERAGE
Across two dimensions, Elena et al. make their final push to save Fell's Church. I picked up this series because of the Jenny Nicholson video about the show, but specifically because of the quote she pulls from the fanwiki about Bonnie and Damon's relationship. I'm delighted that the series lives up to the conflicted, garbled poetry of that synopsis. The relationships are, as ever, a bombastic mess; and there's canonical proto-polyamory in this book. Amazing. Not good, I mean, obviously; and subject always to revision as Smith chases her id-of-the book.
The mess and bombast don't translated well outside the romances, and this is poorly paced and full of unbelievable characterization, and I just don't care about the Dark Dimension or the antagonists of this arc (blame that on the awkward Japanophilia). So far, only the first three Vampire Diaries books have actually been worth reading. But the rest are worth hearing in summary. That renders the madness of the plot at least entertaining; and, excised from plot, there's so much potential and intrigue and intensity in the relationships. An "indescribable, electrifying, and magnetic connection." Bonnie is Damon's weak spot, his only tenderness, in an antihero forming one leg of an even messier love triangle-turned-complex-polygon! There's a lot of blood drinking and psychic bonding! Don't you want to read that? I mean, you really shouldn't; but don't you want to?
The mess and bombast don't translated well outside the romances, and this is poorly paced and full of unbelievable characterization, and I just don't care about the Dark Dimension or the antagonists of this arc (blame that on the awkward Japanophilia). So far, only the first three Vampire Diaries books have actually been worth reading. But the rest are worth hearing in summary. That renders the madness of the plot at least entertaining; and, excised from plot, there's so much potential and intrigue and intensity in the relationships. An "indescribable, electrifying, and magnetic connection." Bonnie is Damon's weak spot, his only tenderness, in an antihero forming one leg of an even messier love triangle-turned-complex-polygon! There's a lot of blood drinking and psychic bonding! Don't you want to read that? I mean, you really shouldn't; but don't you want to?
adventurous
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
fast-paced
Bien. Son un poco pesados pero los momentos dulces me encantan.
La muerte para muchos y raros acontecimientos pero al final tenemos un final muy cliché.
Stefan ama a Elena de una manera noble y tierna. Damon la ama porque son muy similares, la única mujer que no puede manipular y la pasión que desprenden juntos. Elena los ama a los dos pero la autora no fabrica bien su personalidad porque nos quiere vender a este corazón divido en dos, amoroso que daría todo por ellos pero lo que tenemos es a una hipócrita y muy egoísta persona, Elena es simplemente egoísta y un tanto per**, no se merece a ninguno de los Salvatore.
El libro es entretenido pero aún le falta ese toque que te haga querer releerlo y amarlo.
La muerte para muchos y raros acontecimientos pero al final tenemos un final muy cliché.
Stefan ama a Elena de una manera noble y tierna. Damon la ama porque son muy similares, la única mujer que no puede manipular y la pasión que desprenden juntos. Elena los ama a los dos pero la autora no fabrica bien su personalidad porque nos quiere vender a este corazón divido en dos, amoroso que daría todo por ellos pero lo que tenemos es a una hipócrita y muy egoísta persona, Elena es simplemente egoísta y un tanto per**, no se merece a ninguno de los Salvatore.
El libro es entretenido pero aún le falta ese toque que te haga querer releerlo y amarlo.
adventurous
dark
emotional
tense
medium-paced
Best book in the Return trilogy in my opinion but it is still far from a masterpiece. It wasn’t great but then I found myself needing to know what happened next.
My love for Damon & Bonnie carried me through this book & wish we got more time with both of them. I was pleasantly surprised there were some twists I didn’t see coming, with one or two that I did.
I’ve noticed in the last few books there are random scenes that are inserted that happen but then are never talked about again & we never see the characters again? I just wish there was more thought into the book instead of randomly adding fluff.
My love for Damon & Bonnie carried me through this book & wish we got more time with both of them. I was pleasantly surprised there were some twists I didn’t see coming, with one or two that I did.
I’ve noticed in the last few books there are random scenes that are inserted that happen but then are never talked about again & we never see the characters again? I just wish there was more thought into the book instead of randomly adding fluff.
adventurous
emotional
mysterious
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I think I hate all the characters in this book and I've no idea why I even bought it and read it. I don't even care that it ended on a giant cliffhanger, I will not read the next pile of shit 'trilogy' to find out what happens. I'm sick of L.J. Smith's shit.
Spoilers galore in this review, because honestly, spoilers can't ruin this book for anyone, the book ruins itself.
The POV swings in this book were utterly confusing and tiring, the plot was a pile of shit and the descriptions were fucking stupid. You could really tell L.J loved the posh Dark Dimension shit because there was tons of description on Lady Ulma's mansion and the 'Celestial Court' building, and a ridiculous amount of description on the barren wastelands that they travelled across, and she generally used ridiculous language that you never hear anyone use, let alone a 18 year old who doesn't seem all that smart, for all her perfect-ness. It was just tiring reading this book. Truly tiring.
Let's see why I hate all the characters: Elena is an indecisive bitch who is perfect in every way, so much so that she is allowed to have two love interests and it's perfectly okay.
The love square is truly ridiculous: Stefan loves Elena, Elena loves Stefan and Damon, Damon loves Elena and Bonnie and Bonnie loves Damon. Why not just have it going all the way around and have Bonnie and Stefan fall in love? Then there could be foursomes every other weekend. More seriously though, Elena gets hugely pissed off with Stefan for acting all, you know, JEALOUS and uncool stuff like that over her and Damon, yet when she notices Damon and Bonnie being flirty HELL HATH NO FURY. Elena Gilbert, number one hypocrite, but it's okay because Elena is perfect in every way and has pretty hair. Also, did I mention Elena killed her parents? But that's okay because she's perfect and pretty and that.
The fact that in the end they wave a magical wand and EVERYTHING FROM THE LAST 7 BOOKS HAS NOT HAPPENED is just great. Why the fuck did I read any of these books then? Except, of course, now Damon is dead. Except, of course, the cliffhanger is that he isn't. Oh, and Elena is probably going to be immortal because she has some magic water in an Evian bottle. PRODUCT PLACEMENT. Anyway, she'll probably drink that and live forever and apparently there's enough for 'maybe 4 or 5 people' if I remember correctly, so that's Bonnie, Meredith, Matt and Mrs. Flowers! YAY, THIS SCOOBY DOO GANG CAN GO ON FOREVER, YAY. Oh god, I can't imagine a world where that group of pricks exist for all of time and are indestructible. Fuck.
Bonnie. Bonniebonniebonnie. I fucking hate Bonnie. She's terrified of everything, and everyone has to factor in Bonnie's reaction to stuff before they do anything and it's fucking absurd when lives are at stake or whatever. Also, her jumping into that hole after Damon and then complaining when he left her somewhere safe was so mindblowingly stupid that I realised nothing could make me hate her more because surely that should have made me explode with rage, but it didn't because I was past that point.
Meredith. Apparently Meredith has known she is a 'hunter-slayer' (term only invented in this, the 7th book of the series) all her life and it has influenced none of her actions for the past 6 books when there were vampires EVERYWHERE, most of them doing evil shit like killing her best friend, destroying her town, going on a mass-murdering spree. Also, apparently Meredith is part vampire! She has kitten teeth! And she has a twin brother who is a vampire and can age and that! This so does not fuck with her story in the previous books. So doesn't at all. Also, another cliffhanger, Meredith declaring she has to find and kill her brother. I DON'T CARE. I'M NOT GOING TO BUY YOUR NEW TRILOGY.
Stefan is a dick. Stefan basically doesn't care about anything in the entire world except Elena despite having lived for like, 500 years or something with no Elena in his life. His character in general is completely boring and it's actually impossible to imagine him without Elena giving him 'purpose', if you can call it that when he's basically only living as a romantic interest to someone who is in love with someone else as well as him. He's a completely useless character.
Damon. What the fuck was the point in him becoming a human in the last book? There was no point. Also, his dying went on for far too long with that 'inner child' and Elena shit, but that's really more of a complaint about Elena, so. Damon is possibly the only redeeming feature of this book because he's the only one with a vaguely interesting personality, but even he acts/thinks like a twat sometimes. It's probably L.J.Smithicitus.
Shinichi died by saying something. He's been the big evil bad guy for the past 2 books, and he dies just by saying 'I wish I didn't do this' after absorbing his sister. Fucking brilliant. Ooh, he's so scary he can be killed with fucking regrets. Great.
Small aside: I didn't understand Sage. What was his purpose? Who was his father? Do I actually even care? No, not really. He was only introduced in the last book, you can't really use him as another cliffhanger for me to buy your shitty new trilogy centring around this dickwad set of characters.
Another aside: The wolf shit was fucking stupid. A pack of wolves just completely accepting a DOG as their new alpha male without so much as a fight? Realistic. Also, someone pregnant with werewolf babies is now going to be a werewolf for the rest of their life? What? Why? But don't the babies produced have to kill to trigger the werewolf gene? Huh?
Anyway, all in all, I'm glad this pile of shit trilogy is over and if I talk myself into buying the next book when it comes out somewhere along the line (out of some OCD annoyance at not having read 'the full thing' or something) then you may punch me repeatedly in the face.
Spoilers galore in this review, because honestly, spoilers can't ruin this book for anyone, the book ruins itself.
The POV swings in this book were utterly confusing and tiring, the plot was a pile of shit and the descriptions were fucking stupid. You could really tell L.J loved the posh Dark Dimension shit because there was tons of description on Lady Ulma's mansion and the 'Celestial Court' building, and a ridiculous amount of description on the barren wastelands that they travelled across, and she generally used ridiculous language that you never hear anyone use, let alone a 18 year old who doesn't seem all that smart, for all her perfect-ness. It was just tiring reading this book. Truly tiring.
Let's see why I hate all the characters: Elena is an indecisive bitch who is perfect in every way, so much so that she is allowed to have two love interests and it's perfectly okay.
The love square is truly ridiculous: Stefan loves Elena, Elena loves Stefan and Damon, Damon loves Elena and Bonnie and Bonnie loves Damon. Why not just have it going all the way around and have Bonnie and Stefan fall in love? Then there could be foursomes every other weekend. More seriously though, Elena gets hugely pissed off with Stefan for acting all, you know, JEALOUS and uncool stuff like that over her and Damon, yet when she notices Damon and Bonnie being flirty HELL HATH NO FURY. Elena Gilbert, number one hypocrite, but it's okay because Elena is perfect in every way and has pretty hair. Also, did I mention Elena killed her parents? But that's okay because she's perfect and pretty and that.
The fact that in the end they wave a magical wand and EVERYTHING FROM THE LAST 7 BOOKS HAS NOT HAPPENED is just great. Why the fuck did I read any of these books then? Except, of course, now Damon is dead. Except, of course, the cliffhanger is that he isn't. Oh, and Elena is probably going to be immortal because she has some magic water in an Evian bottle. PRODUCT PLACEMENT. Anyway, she'll probably drink that and live forever and apparently there's enough for 'maybe 4 or 5 people' if I remember correctly, so that's Bonnie, Meredith, Matt and Mrs. Flowers! YAY, THIS SCOOBY DOO GANG CAN GO ON FOREVER, YAY. Oh god, I can't imagine a world where that group of pricks exist for all of time and are indestructible. Fuck.
Bonnie. Bonniebonniebonnie. I fucking hate Bonnie. She's terrified of everything, and everyone has to factor in Bonnie's reaction to stuff before they do anything and it's fucking absurd when lives are at stake or whatever. Also, her jumping into that hole after Damon and then complaining when he left her somewhere safe was so mindblowingly stupid that I realised nothing could make me hate her more because surely that should have made me explode with rage, but it didn't because I was past that point.
Meredith. Apparently Meredith has known she is a 'hunter-slayer' (term only invented in this, the 7th book of the series) all her life and it has influenced none of her actions for the past 6 books when there were vampires EVERYWHERE, most of them doing evil shit like killing her best friend, destroying her town, going on a mass-murdering spree. Also, apparently Meredith is part vampire! She has kitten teeth! And she has a twin brother who is a vampire and can age and that! This so does not fuck with her story in the previous books. So doesn't at all. Also, another cliffhanger, Meredith declaring she has to find and kill her brother. I DON'T CARE. I'M NOT GOING TO BUY YOUR NEW TRILOGY.
Stefan is a dick. Stefan basically doesn't care about anything in the entire world except Elena despite having lived for like, 500 years or something with no Elena in his life. His character in general is completely boring and it's actually impossible to imagine him without Elena giving him 'purpose', if you can call it that when he's basically only living as a romantic interest to someone who is in love with someone else as well as him. He's a completely useless character.
Damon. What the fuck was the point in him becoming a human in the last book? There was no point. Also, his dying went on for far too long with that 'inner child' and Elena shit, but that's really more of a complaint about Elena, so. Damon is possibly the only redeeming feature of this book because he's the only one with a vaguely interesting personality, but even he acts/thinks like a twat sometimes. It's probably L.J.Smithicitus.
Shinichi died by saying something. He's been the big evil bad guy for the past 2 books, and he dies just by saying 'I wish I didn't do this' after absorbing his sister. Fucking brilliant. Ooh, he's so scary he can be killed with fucking regrets. Great.
Small aside: I didn't understand Sage. What was his purpose? Who was his father? Do I actually even care? No, not really. He was only introduced in the last book, you can't really use him as another cliffhanger for me to buy your shitty new trilogy centring around this dickwad set of characters.
Another aside: The wolf shit was fucking stupid. A pack of wolves just completely accepting a DOG as their new alpha male without so much as a fight? Realistic. Also, someone pregnant with werewolf babies is now going to be a werewolf for the rest of their life? What? Why? But don't the babies produced have to kill to trigger the werewolf gene? Huh?
Anyway, all in all, I'm glad this pile of shit trilogy is over and if I talk myself into buying the next book when it comes out somewhere along the line (out of some OCD annoyance at not having read 'the full thing' or something) then you may punch me repeatedly in the face.
All that I can say is that I'm glad I finished this book. For some reason, this whole Return series just doesn't feel all that enjoyable to me. Elena is super annoying and a big cheater, liar, drama queen and goody two shoes and she just drives me insane with her thoughts and behavior. I will read the Hunters series because I feel like I should finish the series since I started it but I hope that Elena will be more like the girl in the first three books because that was when I did actually liked her.
I gave it four stars because although the beginning and middle were absolutely slow and boring, the ending completely made up for it. The ending reminded me why I started reading the series in the first place, and why I'm going to read the next book even though it took me forever to get through this one.
adventurous
challenging
emotional
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Plot
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No