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159 reviews for:
Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility
Foster Cline, Jim Fay
3.75 AVERAGE
159 reviews for:
Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility
Foster Cline, Jim Fay
3.75 AVERAGE
Easy read. This approach is not comprehensive, but it could be a good adjunct to other techniques.
I found the examples that were considered appropriate interactions between parent and child to be demeaning to the child. In some cases, they were even harmful. There are lots of great parenting books out there. This isn’t one of them.
I loved this! I think a lot of the examples/suggestions really apply to older kids, but I definitely picked up some nuggets I can start implementing with my 4-year old.
I'm sure this is supposed to be a "follow all of our suggestions to succeed" method, but I'm picking up what I feel will be useful for our situation and don't plan on following everything recommended in the book exactly how it’s written.
I’m not going to send my 4-year old to bed hungry because he doesn’t want to eat what I made for dinner, but I will consider it if he tries to pull something like that when he’s 15. I’m not going to let my 4-year old stay up as late as he wants and hope he learns the consequences of being tired and grumpy the next day, but it may work with an older kid (although I’m still not buying this one). A lot of the consequence-driven examples of letting the kid learn the hard way would be more applicable to older kids, and some are a little too extreme for me, but it was a good eye-opener to start to let my son learn his actions have consequences so he can start to make his own decisions. I’m not going to ignore if he’s getting a D in a class and let his failing teach him the life lesson, but I’ll let him decide if he wants to wear a sweater when it’s chilly out instead of making him put it on and try to remember to let him make other small choices instead of telling him what he should do so he can process the best options.
I love the idea of giving my son options when he’s misbehaving so he chooses his punishment or give him options of how to complete the task if I want him to do something. I have always tried to take the approach of talking to my son like he’s an adult, by giving him respect and asking him nicely to do things like pick up his toys, etc. with please/thank you and notice he usually reacts without hesitation if I ask him nicely vs. if I’m having a bad day and start commanding him to clean up his mess, etc. It was nice to read that it’s part of the recommended method and helped me relate to the book more because I have seen how I get such a better response if I nicely ask him to help instead of telling him to help.
Overall I think the book has a lot of nuggets that will be very useful to helping me take a more loving approach to parenting and trying to let my son to learn to make his own decisions, but I don’t think it’s an all-or-nothing approach. I won’t be following all the recommendations, but it has given me a lot to think about and I’ll probably read again as he gets older.
I'm sure this is supposed to be a "follow all of our suggestions to succeed" method, but I'm picking up what I feel will be useful for our situation and don't plan on following everything recommended in the book exactly how it’s written.
I’m not going to send my 4-year old to bed hungry because he doesn’t want to eat what I made for dinner, but I will consider it if he tries to pull something like that when he’s 15. I’m not going to let my 4-year old stay up as late as he wants and hope he learns the consequences of being tired and grumpy the next day, but it may work with an older kid (although I’m still not buying this one). A lot of the consequence-driven examples of letting the kid learn the hard way would be more applicable to older kids, and some are a little too extreme for me, but it was a good eye-opener to start to let my son learn his actions have consequences so he can start to make his own decisions. I’m not going to ignore if he’s getting a D in a class and let his failing teach him the life lesson, but I’ll let him decide if he wants to wear a sweater when it’s chilly out instead of making him put it on and try to remember to let him make other small choices instead of telling him what he should do so he can process the best options.
I love the idea of giving my son options when he’s misbehaving so he chooses his punishment or give him options of how to complete the task if I want him to do something. I have always tried to take the approach of talking to my son like he’s an adult, by giving him respect and asking him nicely to do things like pick up his toys, etc. with please/thank you and notice he usually reacts without hesitation if I ask him nicely vs. if I’m having a bad day and start commanding him to clean up his mess, etc. It was nice to read that it’s part of the recommended method and helped me relate to the book more because I have seen how I get such a better response if I nicely ask him to help instead of telling him to help.
Overall I think the book has a lot of nuggets that will be very useful to helping me take a more loving approach to parenting and trying to let my son to learn to make his own decisions, but I don’t think it’s an all-or-nothing approach. I won’t be following all the recommendations, but it has given me a lot to think about and I’ll probably read again as he gets older.
Some good premises here about allowing children to experience natural consequences to behaviour rather than sheltering them. I was disappointed to find lots of vignettes mocking how a parent reacted to a situation, without providing a suggested script on "how this could have been better handled."
I found it a touch sexist at times, and the authors' values didn't quite coincide with my own. But if you can get past that and the religious component of it, the ideas seem pretty solid.
This is one of the better parenting books that I have read. I will be referring back to this book often as I attempt to raise my three kiddos.
They have some good basics to live by in helping children learn to make choices and live with the consequences whether good or bad. But I found them both a too preachy for me, a bit dogmatic, and some of their examples I just didn't agree with. Read it for some of the basics.
I've read this book before quite a while ago. I thought it would be interesting to read it again.
It was well worth reading again. I got some more ideas to help make a few things run smoothly at our house.
It was well worth reading again. I got some more ideas to help make a few things run smoothly at our house.
I like the overall method - love the kid and give them logical consequences to mimic the real world. Easier for them to pay for it at 9 than 19! However, some of the examples of what to do were a 'no way' for me. If my kid is scared at night and needs comfort, I'm not going to play the get over it so mommy can sleep card. Seems unnecessary. Take some of the scenarios with a grain of salt and adapt to your personal tastes.