Take a photo of a barcode or cover
2.99 AVERAGE
2.99 AVERAGE
informative
lighthearted
reflective
fast-paced
While the book does give insight into how our society has groomed men and women to be and how one can respond to these behaviors, it negates the fact that to truly grow both need to unlearn many of these negative habits in dealing with emotions. For example, one of the concepts that "men are rubber bands" and need time and space to deal with their emotions privately and will come back when they are ready. This is more evident of a power struggle within the relationship, control issues, or a fear of intimacy. Many times throughout the book, Gray tells women to just wait or stop doing behaviors, ultimately bestowing the power back to the man. This was a frequent theme throughout the book.
If you have a static view of gender and gender roles and want a deeper understanding of how they function within your relationship, by all means read this book. If you want to actually learn how to improve your relationship do not waste your time reading this.
If you have a static view of gender and gender roles and want a deeper understanding of how they function within your relationship, by all means read this book. If you want to actually learn how to improve your relationship do not waste your time reading this.
The classic guide to male and female relationships. Offers the reader the perspective of the opposite sex: how different their ways of thinking are and how to reduce the conflicts caused by such differences.
Genderissues are difficult. I myself believe that the psychological differences we experience between men and women are a construct that suppresses both genders, and therefore, that we should work towards ending those differences. For example, that we think women are more emotional is only because we learn men not to be emotional, which causes a lot of problems for both genders because men don't learn to express themselves (which can cause, amongst other things, anger issues) and women feel unappreciated because they feel like men don't trust them enough to share their feelings. Again, just an example, ofcourse this may vary for every person. And although I think we should learn the new generation that this kind of differences are not genetic, and that it's ok for men to show their emotions, we still have a generation at the moment who hasn't learned that. That generation needs to learn to deal with those differences, and maybe this book can help with that. I sincerely hope this book is outdated within a generation, but I also hope that untill then, it can help some people.
By the way, the funniest thing about this book was the review at the back of the book by Maarten 't Hart. He completely destroyed it.
By the way, the funniest thing about this book was the review at the back of the book by Maarten 't Hart. He completely destroyed it.
Can't finish this book. This is really terrible.
Severely outdated and sexist. Nearly every stereotype of "men" and "women" was reflected in this book - so much it was almost humorous.
That being said, it is interesting to read what couples were reading decades ago on how to have a healthy relationship. It's giving "cigarettes are healthy for you" energy. It helps when trying to understand why older generations were the way they were when I read what was likely a more "progressive" look at relationships at the time.
That being said, it is interesting to read what couples were reading decades ago on how to have a healthy relationship. It's giving "cigarettes are healthy for you" energy. It helps when trying to understand why older generations were the way they were when I read what was likely a more "progressive" look at relationships at the time.
This book is clearly sexist, cheesy, repetitive, and not scientific. At the same time the underlying message of mindful communication, behavior, and reflection is worth thinking about. If you can ignore the sexism and instead focus on how speech and behavior are interpreted by someone of a different mindset, the book offers many examples based on the author's observations. He makes clear in the introduction he is stereotyping with the statement "I make many generalizations about men and women in this book", but I don't think that should excuse the content. In retrospect I should have read a different book but given how much this book is part of popular culture I found myself reading it anyway. If nothing else it made me be more aware of thinking about differences in how people communicate and behave even if the underlying context was outdated.
A fairly engaging book simply because it reads like misogynistic rage bait—you want to keep going just to see what ridiculous thing he’s gonna say next. The author’s argument is basically that men are inherently avoidant, and women should excuse their immaturity and fragile masculinity for the sake of making their men feel “accepted” and to avoid coming off as “demanding”. Not sure how this man was ever allowed to have a counseling practice considering a google search will tell you that none of his education is verified and/or accredited, and his PhD is unaccredited from a defunct online university. He has also been documented in interviews saying that divorce happens because “feminism promotes independence in women” and that “feminism holds back sales of my books”. And I should believe somebody who says this is going to provide me with an unbiased account in this work? His audience may have been gullible and uninformed enough in the 90s to think his writing holds substance, but it is definitely a product of its time and should be taken with a grain of salt by anybody reading in the 21st century.
Blinks:
1. Men and women show love in different ways - and love thrives when we accept our differences.
2. Men and women empower one another when they understand how to talk effectively, and how to motivate their partners.
3. Men and women experience different intimacy cycles that affect their abilities to give and receive love.
4. Men and women have different emotional needs and "score relationship points" in different ways.
5. When negative emotions arise, it's important to communicate lovingly - because arguments can ruin a relationship.
6. Knowing how to ask for support will keep your love alive.
1. Men and women show love in different ways - and love thrives when we accept our differences.
2. Men and women empower one another when they understand how to talk effectively, and how to motivate their partners.
3. Men and women experience different intimacy cycles that affect their abilities to give and receive love.
4. Men and women have different emotional needs and "score relationship points" in different ways.
5. When negative emotions arise, it's important to communicate lovingly - because arguments can ruin a relationship.
6. Knowing how to ask for support will keep your love alive.
There is too much hype surrounding this book. It is shockingly shite and massively overrated. It was full to the brim with inane, pseudoscientific, misogynistic drivel, rehashing tired and outdated sexist gender stereotypes. It is more useful as toilet paper. Don't waste your money. Unfortunately, the option to rate it zero stars isn't available but it would certainly be more deserving of a zero star rating.