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chachacenteno's review against another edition
5.0
This story moved me to tears. The misconception, the prejudice, the hurt and most of all, the love portrayed in this story is so profound, I couldn't put it down. The beautiful relationship between sisters shows the paradox of mixed race and religion in today's world. This book screams discussion group. I doubt words could properly explain the points of view readers find themselves in. The book leaves readers in nostalgia, a state of contemplation about their own thoughts and beliefs, especially on feminism, religion and being true to oneself. Every person who has ever judged a woman wearing a head scarf, a sari or a veil should read this book.
qomareads's review against another edition
Based on actual events that it kinda broke me. Short but powerful. Read this in one sitting. Honestly the writing and plot were mediocre and very easy to follow but the issues were perfectly portrayed and something that most of us can relate too.
We follows a story of two sisters, born as a Muslims living in French. They're what we called opposite attracts. Sohane is the religious one I must say, while Dejilia is the rebellious type. As we've already know the French laws can be a bit oppressive regarding the hijabs issue. Living in a country with the majority practicing Islam this is not an issue to most of us. But reading this from Sohane POV I was furious. It's absurd how a hijab/head scarf can cause such chaos and dramatic chain of events. Bloody ridiculous.
Then there's Dejilia, the issue here is something you can relate to the Taliban. Forcing a women, punishing them in the name of religion and I was enraged on the tragic ending. It's about religion, choices, sisterhood, family, friends, the oppressive, the liberals and humanity.
I'm not really sure with how Sohane came to her conclusion in the end. I think the author done a really great job at writing this based on research/inspiration and not her actual experiences. Normalize not rating a book when one cannot decide. I'm having mixed feelings about this one so i'm not gonna rate this too.
We follows a story of two sisters, born as a Muslims living in French. They're what we called opposite attracts. Sohane is the religious one I must say, while Dejilia is the rebellious type. As we've already know the French laws can be a bit oppressive regarding the hijabs issue. Living in a country with the majority practicing Islam this is not an issue to most of us. But reading this from Sohane POV I was furious. It's absurd how a hijab/head scarf can cause such chaos and dramatic chain of events. Bloody ridiculous.
Then there's Dejilia, the issue here is something you can relate to the Taliban. Forcing a women, punishing them in the name of religion and I was enraged on the tragic ending. It's about religion, choices, sisterhood, family, friends, the oppressive, the liberals and humanity.
I'm not really sure with how Sohane came to her conclusion in the end. I think the author done a really great job at writing this based on research/inspiration and not her actual experiences. Normalize not rating a book when one cannot decide. I'm having mixed feelings about this one so i'm not gonna rate this too.
kategorveatte's review against another edition
4.0
I loved this book. I hated that it ended. I miss it now a week after finishing it.
I only wish I was fluent enough in French to have read this book in its original language because there were a few places where I felt the writing was jilted, but that's likely a result of the translation.
Amélie Sarn took a heartbreakingly true story and created a fictional approach to the horrors of life in racial and religious persecution. Sohane and Djelila embodied the typical sisterly relationship but with the heightened pressures of society and legal ramifications of their actions. I assumed there was going to be a death by the title of the story but I could never have guessed that death would come by being burned alive. Oof. And then there's the aspect of Sohane's survivor's guilt. Survivor's guilt is a heavy topic to tackle, but Sarn succeeds in the creation of her characters.
If I could add anything to this book, I would have included an epilogue that covers the legal aspects of the boy who burned Djelilah. I wanted justice!
I only wish I was fluent enough in French to have read this book in its original language because there were a few places where I felt the writing was jilted, but that's likely a result of the translation.
Amélie Sarn took a heartbreakingly true story and created a fictional approach to the horrors of life in racial and religious persecution. Sohane and Djelila embodied the typical sisterly relationship but with the heightened pressures of society and legal ramifications of their actions. I assumed there was going to be a death by the title of the story but I could never have guessed that death would come by being burned alive. Oof. And then there's the aspect of Sohane's survivor's guilt. Survivor's guilt is a heavy topic to tackle, but Sarn succeeds in the creation of her characters.
If I could add anything to this book, I would have included an epilogue that covers the legal aspects of the boy who burned Djelilah. I wanted justice!
notyourhijabi's review against another edition
5.0
Review first published on http://reading-is-dreaming-with-open-eyes.blogspot.com/2015/07/amelie-sarn-i-love-i-hate-i-miss-my.html
"I don't want to live in fear. I don't want my choices to be dictated by fear. I don't want to be what others have decided I should be. I want to be myself. Do you understand, Sohane?"
This book just left me feeling speechless. On reading the synopsis I expected a typical conflicted-sister relationship but nothing could have prepared me for the intensity the author carried throughout the book with perfect ease. It was chilling. It was unbelievable. Yet it was based on a TRUE STORY. Well, damn.
Sohane is a typical eighteen-year-old. She loves no one as much as she loves her care-free, gorgeous little sister Djelila- and she hates no one as much. Even though they both grew up together, Sohane can't help but feel Djelila turning into someone different and it frustrates her that she can't stop this.
"I just want to be me. I don't want to be ashamed of being Muslim and of practicing my religion. I'd like people to accept that. I don't intend to harm anyone."
While Sohane accepts being Muslim, along with all that it entails- including the head cover, her sister wants to be free of this. All Djelila wants is to live life the way she wants. But this is easier said than done because neighborhood kids who had taken it upon themselves to be the "religious police" start to harass her for not dressing modestly enough.
Sohane (understandably) feels a bit of Schadenfreude when she first gets to know this, but pretty soon understands the extent to which this problem has grown when the wannabe gangsters attempt to physically harm Djelila. What follows next is the journey of each girl towards self-discovery, and the price they have to pay for being true to themselves.
"We dreamt of a life that we would build, a life in which no one would step on our feet, in which we would walk with our heads raised. The world had better watch out!"
Things I liked:
-The author's portrayal of the relationship between two sisters who differ greatly in their personality and beliefs and nevertheless love each other very much.
-The writing style, alternating between the past and present. While I'm sure some may find it annoying, but I felt it suited the story very well indeed.
-The story idea gives the reader something to think about. The fact that this truly happened in France is terrifyingly shocking.
-Character development of both Sohane and Djelila. I personally found myself being able to relate to both the sisters very much.
-The raw emotions, the heart-breaking narration- all done to utmost perfection in Sohane's point of view.
-A deep insight into the lives of children living life trying to find their identity in a world where they are judged by their religious beliefs (or lack thereof).
Things I disliked? Well, the book was too short for my liking!! But honestly, even that is understandable considering the nature of the plot. The author could have perhaps elaborated on the religious issues- but it definitely wouldn't have struck a chord with a majority of the audience.
So, all things considered, this was gem of a book, conveying a harrowing and intense story infused with some really powerful moments.
"Most journalists talk about what they do not know, about matters they don’t take the trouble to understand. They adopt the clichés that suit them—take one aspect of an issue until it becomes a caricature. To them, being a Muslim man means wanting to enslave women, to deny them any rights. I can’t say that this isn’t reality. But it’s only one reality among many—the one that is best known since it’s the one that gets the most media coverage. All I need is to be in sync with my beliefs and religion, even if that seems ridiculous to other girls my age. It's true that I've never gone out with a boy. So what? I have lots of other things to think about for now. Besides, love seems too important to last only three days or even two months. Or does being a teenager mean you have to be frivolous? Should your main interest be the color of your eye shadow, or the clothes you wear? Should whether my thong shows above my jeans be my sole concern? What a fascinating debate, right?"
A must-read for fans of realistic fiction that that punches one in the gut.
The story idea: 5/5
The realization of the story: 5/5
The characters: 5/5
The cover: 4/5
Enjoy factor: 5/5
Final Rating:5/5
"I don't want to live in fear. I don't want my choices to be dictated by fear. I don't want to be what others have decided I should be. I want to be myself. Do you understand, Sohane?"
This book just left me feeling speechless. On reading the synopsis I expected a typical conflicted-sister relationship but nothing could have prepared me for the intensity the author carried throughout the book with perfect ease. It was chilling. It was unbelievable. Yet it was based on a TRUE STORY. Well, damn.
Sohane is a typical eighteen-year-old. She loves no one as much as she loves her care-free, gorgeous little sister Djelila- and she hates no one as much. Even though they both grew up together, Sohane can't help but feel Djelila turning into someone different and it frustrates her that she can't stop this.
"I just want to be me. I don't want to be ashamed of being Muslim and of practicing my religion. I'd like people to accept that. I don't intend to harm anyone."
While Sohane accepts being Muslim, along with all that it entails- including the head cover, her sister wants to be free of this. All Djelila wants is to live life the way she wants. But this is easier said than done because neighborhood kids who had taken it upon themselves to be the "religious police" start to harass her for not dressing modestly enough.
Sohane (understandably) feels a bit of Schadenfreude when she first gets to know this, but pretty soon understands the extent to which this problem has grown when the wannabe gangsters attempt to physically harm Djelila. What follows next is the journey of each girl towards self-discovery, and the price they have to pay for being true to themselves.
"We dreamt of a life that we would build, a life in which no one would step on our feet, in which we would walk with our heads raised. The world had better watch out!"
Things I liked:
-The author's portrayal of the relationship between two sisters who differ greatly in their personality and beliefs and nevertheless love each other very much.
-The writing style, alternating between the past and present. While I'm sure some may find it annoying, but I felt it suited the story very well indeed.
-The story idea gives the reader something to think about. The fact that this truly happened in France is terrifyingly shocking.
-Character development of both Sohane and Djelila. I personally found myself being able to relate to both the sisters very much.
-The raw emotions, the heart-breaking narration- all done to utmost perfection in Sohane's point of view.
-A deep insight into the lives of children living life trying to find their identity in a world where they are judged by their religious beliefs (or lack thereof).
Things I disliked? Well, the book was too short for my liking!! But honestly, even that is understandable considering the nature of the plot. The author could have perhaps elaborated on the religious issues- but it definitely wouldn't have struck a chord with a majority of the audience.
So, all things considered, this was gem of a book, conveying a harrowing and intense story infused with some really powerful moments.
"Most journalists talk about what they do not know, about matters they don’t take the trouble to understand. They adopt the clichés that suit them—take one aspect of an issue until it becomes a caricature. To them, being a Muslim man means wanting to enslave women, to deny them any rights. I can’t say that this isn’t reality. But it’s only one reality among many—the one that is best known since it’s the one that gets the most media coverage. All I need is to be in sync with my beliefs and religion, even if that seems ridiculous to other girls my age. It's true that I've never gone out with a boy. So what? I have lots of other things to think about for now. Besides, love seems too important to last only three days or even two months. Or does being a teenager mean you have to be frivolous? Should your main interest be the color of your eye shadow, or the clothes you wear? Should whether my thong shows above my jeans be my sole concern? What a fascinating debate, right?"
A must-read for fans of realistic fiction that that punches one in the gut.
The story idea: 5/5
The realization of the story: 5/5
The characters: 5/5
The cover: 4/5
Enjoy factor: 5/5
Final Rating:5/5
elephant's review against another edition
4.0
This is a poignant story told about sisterhood and tragedy. Based on a true story it tells the story of Sohane, a Muslim teenager in France, who decides to wear a head scarf after a law has been passed declaring it illegal in schools. At the same time, her younger sister Djelila is shunning her Muslim heritage and acting as French and modern as she can. When some neighborhood Muslim boys begin to bully Djelila for not following the Muslim customs, she does not realize just how dangerous the Muslim bullies are. This is a short and sad story that brings to light the injustices that Muslims force upon women and tells a tale of sisterhood.
saskiac's review against another edition
1.0
This is an add to my previous review (under the dotted/dashed line) because I've been thinking about this book lately and authors writing about cultures, social issues etc that aren't native to them. It is great that they do, but when they do, it's important to get it right and not layer on thick stereotypes.
Furthermore, while I did take away things from this story I don't think it was right for a non-own voices author to write this narrative in the way that they did because it has reinforced this association of violence with Islam, and that is not okay. It's horrible. Why not write say, the same story but have a different outcome or just cut away the thread of the story that the gang inhabits. If it was a Muslim author, it would be different. And I know I picked up this book knowing the gist of the story I didn't know the author wasn't Muslim, which I will remember to check next time.
----------------
This book is explores many controversial but important themes.
Family and expectation is one, the relationship between Sohane and Djelila is typical in its growing apart nature as siblings do, they grow older and form their own opinions and beliefs. But you can still see how much they love and care about each other.
As the author mentioned in the author's note, which is very important to remember- this book is not trying to convey whether the hijab should or should not be allowed to be worn in schools, rather Sarn is trying to inquire about "the freedom of women and their right to choose how to live their lives". It is about the violence women face on a day to day basis and how the blame is seemingly forced upon them rather than the perpetrators.
Furthermore, while I did take away things from this story I don't think it was right for a non-own voices author to write this narrative in the way that they did because it has reinforced this association of violence with Islam, and that is not okay. It's horrible. Why not write say, the same story but have a different outcome or just cut away the thread of the story that the gang inhabits. If it was a Muslim author, it would be different. And I know I picked up this book knowing the gist of the story I didn't know the author wasn't Muslim, which I will remember to check next time.
----------------
This book is explores many controversial but important themes.
Family and expectation is one, the relationship between Sohane and Djelila is typical in its growing apart nature as siblings do, they grow older and form their own opinions and beliefs. But you can still see how much they love and care about each other.
As the author mentioned in the author's note, which is very important to remember- this book is not trying to convey whether the hijab should or should not be allowed to be worn in schools, rather Sarn is trying to inquire about "the freedom of women and their right to choose how to live their lives". It is about the violence women face on a day to day basis and how the blame is seemingly forced upon them rather than the perpetrators.
clairewrobel's review against another edition
5.0
This book made me cry. I am a woman and a sister, and a highly empathetic one at that. I felt the tension and terror caused by Majid and his gang. I felt Sohane’s anxiety because I have felt unsafe walking and watching in the streets. I can’t imagine trying to live after the death of a sibling, and I don’t want to. Every time I think of Sohane’s pain, it literally brings me to tears. As a white Christian living in America, it doesn’t immediately seem like I would have a lot in common with an Algerian Muslim living in France. But this book crosses boundaries. The author creates Sohane’s story so that it can be felt across all types of people, but she also does justice to explaining and representing the culture of Islam.
The structure of the novel built up a heartbreaking suspense that left me uneasy chapter after chapter. It was a mix between flashbacks and healing. I can’t remember if I’ve ever read a book written like this, but it was incredibly powerful. Now I’m going to go hug my siblings.
The structure of the novel built up a heartbreaking suspense that left me uneasy chapter after chapter. It was a mix between flashbacks and healing. I can’t remember if I’ve ever read a book written like this, but it was incredibly powerful. Now I’m going to go hug my siblings.
saba_gul_'s review against another edition
3.0
*3.5*
This book was heartbreaking. The fact that it is based on a true story as well just...well, it's just awful.
This book was heartbreaking. The fact that it is based on a true story as well just...well, it's just awful.
ajobeau's review against another edition
3.0
This novel broke my heart. Amelie Sarn’s novel, I Love, I Hate, I Miss my Sister, tells the story of Sohane and Djelila—two sisters with a complicated relationship. The two girls obviously have a lot of love for one another, but their relationship is complicated by their diverging paths. As Sohane becomes increasingly more religious and even starts to wear a head covering to school in representation of her Muslim faith, Djelila becomes more and more secular through her choices of friends and activities. This causes the two to grow apart until Djelila is dead and Sohane is left without a sister and with a broken heart.
This book was sad for many reasons. One, that I fairly obvious, is the plot itself. Reading about someone’s sister who has died was quite disturbing. I couldn’t separate the story of the novel from my own life. I kept picturing my sister and myself in place of Sohane and Djelila. A second part that was quite sad to me was the treatment that Sohane received in response to her head covering. Sohane was asked multiple times to take it off, and when she refused her teachers asked her to leave their class and later the school. Toward the end of the novel, Sohane was asked to leave a women’s group meeting at the community center because of her scarf. The actions that people made toward her were very sad to me. They saw the head covering as a symbol of oppression. This showed their overall ignorance of the Islamic faith. However, Sohane made little effort to educate people and share her own views on why she was wearing the head covering. This also frustrated me.
Although I enjoyed this novel, I only gave it three out of five stars because of the writing. The narrator—Sohane—would jump back and forth between before her sister died and after. However, she gave little indication of what time she was referring to, and this made the story a little complicated to follow.
This book was sad for many reasons. One, that I fairly obvious, is the plot itself. Reading about someone’s sister who has died was quite disturbing. I couldn’t separate the story of the novel from my own life. I kept picturing my sister and myself in place of Sohane and Djelila. A second part that was quite sad to me was the treatment that Sohane received in response to her head covering. Sohane was asked multiple times to take it off, and when she refused her teachers asked her to leave their class and later the school. Toward the end of the novel, Sohane was asked to leave a women’s group meeting at the community center because of her scarf. The actions that people made toward her were very sad to me. They saw the head covering as a symbol of oppression. This showed their overall ignorance of the Islamic faith. However, Sohane made little effort to educate people and share her own views on why she was wearing the head covering. This also frustrated me.
Although I enjoyed this novel, I only gave it three out of five stars because of the writing. The narrator—Sohane—would jump back and forth between before her sister died and after. However, she gave little indication of what time she was referring to, and this made the story a little complicated to follow.