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longlost's review against another edition
emotional
funny
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
"Margot lowered herself down next to Alice, slowly, as if she were dealing with a scared animal. "Have you gone to a doctor?" she asked. She traced her delicate fingers over Alice's shoulder, curving towards her spine. It tickled, but Alice didn't show it.
"I don't need to." Number one, she thought.
"Were you abused? Is that it?"
"No." Number two.
"Are you saving yourself for marriage?"
"I hope that's a joke."
"It was," Margot admitted. Her sad smile burned in the corner of Alice's eyes. "Then what? Tell me. People don't just not like sex without a reason. It's kind of not natural, don't you think?"
This book. This book is so important. The only thing stopping me from rating this book 5 stars entirely is my own discomfort with some of the characters in it, which I'm not 100% sure on whether it's something that personally upsets me because of my own experiences, or whether it does genuinely send a concerning message.
First thing's first: the asexual representation. I'm unsure if the book is own voices, but as an asexual person I felt that the ace community and experience was treated with incredible respect and remains nuanced - I particularly appreciated the discussions between Alice and Takumi, and Alice and her therapist, that show us what asexuality means to her. Outside of the community itself I often see asexuality boiled down to "doesn't have sex ever" with no other characteristics outside of that, and seeing Alice as a character who had her own wants and limits and feelings on sexuality and romance was incredibly refreshing. Takumi was also a sweetheart - my fondness for him was helped by the fact that, honestly, I wasn't that invested or empathetic towards Feenie and Ryan, which we'll get into later.
I'm not an expert on romance by any means, but the one Claire Kann gives us here was very cute. I appreciated that Alice and Takumi have genuine conversations about their needs and wants in their relationship, and the fact that it wasn't as simple as one might hope it would bee.g. when Alice asks him out in the car and his response is less than ideal. The fact that Takumi later acknowledges that he hurt her and makes an effort to make it up to her really cemented my fondness for their relationship.
A big reason of why I finally sat down to read this book was because the author was a person of colour - as a white person with little experience in intersectionality regarding race, it was really an eye-opener to see the discussions between Alice and Takumi and Alice's own reflections on the racism they experience, and how her being black ties into her also being a queer woman.
The only thing I disliked about this book was the handling of the relationship between Feenie, Ryan and Alice. Throughout the book it's framed as a positive thing and shown that they overcome their relationship problems, but the way both Feenie and Ryan treat Alice throughout the middle of the book honestly reminds me very much of my own experiences with abuse. When Alice states that she feels left out of their friendship due to Feenie and Ryan often ditching her to be together(which is shown in the book as them leaving her alone at a party without a word, soon after which she is sexually assaulted by a random partygoer) she is treated like her frustration is unreasonable when she 100% has the right to be upset, especially after what she experienced after her friends left her without a word. One passage in particular that made me uncomfortable to read:
"I don't need to." Number one, she thought.
"Were you abused? Is that it?"
"No." Number two.
"Are you saving yourself for marriage?"
"I hope that's a joke."
"It was," Margot admitted. Her sad smile burned in the corner of Alice's eyes. "Then what? Tell me. People don't just not like sex without a reason. It's kind of not natural, don't you think?"
This book. This book is so important. The only thing stopping me from rating this book 5 stars entirely is my own discomfort with some of the characters in it, which I'm not 100% sure on whether it's something that personally upsets me because of my own experiences, or whether it does genuinely send a concerning message.
First thing's first: the asexual representation. I'm unsure if the book is own voices, but as an asexual person I felt that the ace community and experience was treated with incredible respect and remains nuanced - I particularly appreciated the discussions between Alice and Takumi, and Alice and her therapist, that show us what asexuality means to her. Outside of the community itself I often see asexuality boiled down to "doesn't have sex ever" with no other characteristics outside of that, and seeing Alice as a character who had her own wants and limits and feelings on sexuality and romance was incredibly refreshing. Takumi was also a sweetheart - my fondness for him was helped by the fact that, honestly, I wasn't that invested or empathetic towards Feenie and Ryan, which we'll get into later.
I'm not an expert on romance by any means, but the one Claire Kann gives us here was very cute. I appreciated that Alice and Takumi have genuine conversations about their needs and wants in their relationship, and the fact that it wasn't as simple as one might hope it would be
A big reason of why I finally sat down to read this book was because the author was a person of colour - as a white person with little experience in intersectionality regarding race, it was really an eye-opener to see the discussions between Alice and Takumi and Alice's own reflections on the racism they experience, and how her being black ties into her also being a queer woman.
The only thing I disliked about this book was the handling of the relationship between Feenie, Ryan and Alice. Throughout the book it's framed as a positive thing and shown that they overcome their relationship problems, but the way both Feenie and Ryan treat Alice throughout the middle of the book honestly reminds me very much of my own experiences with abuse. When Alice states that she feels left out of their friendship due to Feenie and Ryan often ditching her to be together
“I think I’d say yes. Just to see. I think I might have a serious squish on him.”
“The fuck is a squish?” Feenie sucked her teeth, shaking her head. “You know what? I don’t want to know. It seems like you’re romantically attracted to him, so there you go. Grand Mystery solved. I hereby resign from my love-coaching duties.”
alongside:
“We went upstairs. You actually left the party. That is not the same thing.” [Feenie] looked Alice right in the eyes. “I’m not going to apologize for having sex with my boyfriend when you fucking jumped ship the first chance you got because you couldn’t stand being alone for thirty minutes. Miss me with that bullshit.”
This is the kind of behaviour Feenie continually displays for Alice's transgression of simply leaving the party without them after she was sexually assaulted by a random guy at a party after they left her. Granted, we aren't given a scene where Alice tells them this happened, but it makes them extremely unsympathetic regardless. She's not even visibly angry with them for it, and this is still how she is treated. And despite her defense of the fact that she left Alice alone to be with her boyfriend, she later uses the fact that Alice is spending so much time with Takumi (partly because they, her friends, are gaslighting and belittling her half the time she's at home) and "replacing her" against Alice when she's entirely aware of Alice's conflicting maybe-romantic feelings towards him, which should justify their time spent together by Feenie's logic.
Ryan's better in the fact that he doesn't give Alice passive-aggressive comments like 50% of the time until their reconciliation, but he also tries to frame it that Alice's hurt if unjustified and that it's unfair of her to spend time with someone else without them, which is the same thing they do to her.
alongside:
“We went upstairs. You actually left the party. That is not the same thing.” [Feenie] looked Alice right in the eyes. “I’m not going to apologize for having sex with my boyfriend when you fucking jumped ship the first chance you got because you couldn’t stand being alone for thirty minutes. Miss me with that bullshit.”
This is the kind of behaviour Feenie continually displays for Alice's transgression of simply leaving the party without them after she was sexually assaulted by a random guy at a party after they left her. Granted, we aren't given a scene where Alice tells them this happened, but it makes them extremely unsympathetic regardless. She's not even visibly angry with them for it, and this is still how she is treated. And despite her defense of the fact that she left Alice alone to be with her boyfriend, she later uses the fact that Alice is spending so much time with Takumi (partly because they, her friends, are gaslighting and belittling her half the time she's at home) and "replacing her" against Alice when she's entirely aware of Alice's conflicting maybe-romantic feelings towards him, which should justify their time spent together by Feenie's logic.
Ryan's better in the fact that he doesn't give Alice passive-aggressive comments like 50% of the time until their reconciliation, but he also tries to frame it that Alice's hurt if unjustified and that it's unfair of her to spend time with someone else without them, which is the same thing they do to her.
Alice: “You two spend a lot of time together without me.”
Ryan: “That’s different. We’re engaged.”
Alice: “So I’m just supposed to sit around and wait for you both to remember I exist?”
Ryan: “Of course not, but you shouldn’t edge us out. You’re the one making it as if it has to be him or us.”
Feenie's behaviour throughout their argument made me so uncomfortable to read, and when they do eventually reconcile she turns it around so that Alice is the one apologizing for her hurt while Feenie chastises her for ever believing that Feenie and Ryan don't care about her when it was Feenie and Ryan's own actions that led Alice to be upset. While I really enjoyed the rest of the book and thought it was very well written, this aspect was just so upsetting to me that I found it hard to empathise with Feenie and Ryan's characters, and to feel like Alice was in a safe and healthy friendship with them.
However I wouldn't say that this makes the book a no-read - there's a lot more to the story besides Alice's friendship with them, and I can't say that my discomfort isn't driven by my own personal experiences with abuse and may be seen as completely different by anyone else reading. The ace rep is very well written, and the author weaves her own experiences as a black woman into the narrative in a way that really shows the microaggressions black people face on a daily basis and is worth the read IMO. While the behaviour from Feenie and Ryan and how it was justified in the text made reading this book harder for me, the rest of the story was still enjoyable and I don't regret having read the book.
Feenie's behaviour throughout their argument made me so uncomfortable to read, and when they do eventually reconcile she turns it around so that Alice is the one apologizing for her hurt while Feenie chastises her for ever believing that Feenie and Ryan don't care about her when it was Feenie and Ryan's own actions that led Alice to be upset. While I really enjoyed the rest of the book and thought it was very well written, this aspect was just so upsetting to me that I found it hard to empathise with Feenie and Ryan's characters, and to feel like Alice was in a safe and healthy friendship with them.
However I wouldn't say that this makes the book a no-read - there's a lot more to the story besides Alice's friendship with them, and I can't say that my discomfort isn't driven by my own personal experiences with abuse and may be seen as completely different by anyone else reading. The ace rep is very well written, and the author weaves her own experiences as a black woman into the narrative in a way that really shows the microaggressions black people face on a daily basis and is worth the read IMO. While the behaviour from Feenie and Ryan and how it was justified in the text made reading this book harder for me, the rest of the story was still enjoyable and I don't regret having read the book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racism, Sexual assault, Acephobia/Arophobia, and Toxic friendship
Moderate: Sexual content, Alcohol, and Sexual harassment
Minor: Infidelity
GRAPHIC: Acephobia: Alice faces acephobia from her girlfriend in the very first scene. Racism: As a black woman, Alice faces racism throughout the story. Sexual assault: Alice is sexually assaulted at a costume party. Toxic friendship: Alice's relationship with Feenie and Ryan is treated uncomfortably, as detailed in the above review. MODERATE: Sexual harrassment: There are a few scenes in the book where Alice is unwillingly hit on. Sexual content: Asexuality is discussed in regards to sexual feelings. Alcohol: There's alcohol at a costume party, and Alice drinks a bit when spending time with Takumifaeire_reads's review against another edition
funny
hopeful
lighthearted
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.75
This book was really good, and good ace representation.</confession at the end was perfect and exactly what i would want as an asexual> the only thing I would change is the time skips, they are confusing and don't make sense but overal its a good short read that I recomend
Content Warnings
Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia and Sexual harassment
Moderate: Panic attacks/disorders
Minor: Abandonment
nytephoenyx's review against another edition
emotional
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
I absolutely loved this book.
That’s an understatement.
For three days, I lived and breathed Let’s Talk About Love.
Do y’all remember Tess of the Road? Remember how much I love Tess of the Road? Remember how often I try to plug it because I love the book so much? It has a new friend. I usually write my reviews the evening after I finish a book but I’m sitting here a whole day later and blubbering about how much I loved it. I’m going to try and focus in now and do my best to tell you why.
For most people, Let’s Talk About Love probably won’t be a big deal. It’s a good book with a cute relationship and a frustrating but accurate-feeling friendship and family struggle. Here’s why Let’s Talk About Love is meaningful for me. Listening to Alice’s fears, hopes, doubts, difficulties, and internal monologue was like being in my own head. I believe there are quite a few lines of dialogue in the book that I have said in the same situation about myself. Alice feels trapped by her parents’ expectations. She loves her friends with all of her being but feels like a third wheel and that they’re drifting away. She’s biromantic asexual Black girl in a world that really doesn’t understand her… and doesn’t want to.
Sometimes you read a book and it feels like the author took the words right out of your heart. I have had this experience twice. Tess of the Road and Let’s Talk About Love. I’m trying to be objective but it’s really, really challenging.
Kann’s writing does a good job of bringing the reader into the story and tying them emotionally to Alice’s hopes and fears and insecurities. Alice is a well-rounded character – she has a past that haunts her and a future that eludes her. I like the way her development worked, where she’d start to grow and be stalled by an obstacle or pulled back down by her own insecurities – I related to that a lot, but I also think a lot of people do. The road to growth is not often easy. I also really, really enjoyed that she was a biromantic asexual. I was unable to find whether or not Kann identifies this way as well, but regardless of the author’s personal identity, I felt the representation was spot on.
There were aspects of the world building I really enjoyed as well. The focus on finance. The fact a character actually got sick and it felt real. It’s funny – Takumi behaved precisely the way my husband does when he has a bad cold or a spot of flu. The world is literally ending and basic things like staying in bed and taking medicine needs stern prompting. Again, another small slice life that felt written right out of my own story. Let’s Talk About Love is a romance, but it’s more than just a romance. It’s a story about a friendship. A story about accepting love from various venues. A story about king vulnerable. A story about crafting your life path.
Let’s Talk About Love is the perfect romance. It’s not all flirting, kissing, touching, sex. It’s a balanced relationship filled with honestly, emotional development alongside physical (or not) attraction. I really, really liked it. A lot.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Infidelity and Acephobia/Arophobia
Moderate: Panic attacks/disorders, Racism, Sexual assault, and Sexual harassment
courtneyfalling's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
This was... fine? I wanted to like it based on the concept more than I actually liked it based on the execution. Some sections were a little too drawn out while others were a little too quick, and a lot of the main subplots (Alice's friendship difficulties with Feenie and Ryan or her struggles with her parents and older sister in particular) stressed me out because Alice was so non-confrontational in them to her own detriment and they never truly get openly, fully resolved (or concluded, if not resolved perfectly). And it kept me from liking Alice as a main character, vs. kind of tolerating her and hoping she could learn. Also I feel like as much as I loved Takumi, he always came across as an idealized figure and never as his full, own character. Not to mention the book never really addresses the weird age and knowledge gap between them? Like there's actually a kind of hefty differential here?
Content Warnings
Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia and Toxic friendship
Moderate: Racism
Minor: Infidelity and Sexual harassment
maple_dove's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I love that the platonic love between Alice and Takumi was explored first, and for a long time, before the romance.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racism and Acephobia/Arophobia
Moderate: Sexual content and Sexual harassment
There is a lot of talk about sex. So probably 13+themessyannotator's review against another edition
funny
hopeful
lighthearted
relaxing
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
1.5
I really loved the representation in this book (especially as someone who relates to the biromantic label) and part of the love story were fun to read about. Overall, though, the writing and plot was just lacking for me. The story felt really disjointed, the timelines skipping weeks at a time, and the relationship between Takumi and Alice was just confusing at times with the skips in timeline. Also, the writing felt somewhat young for the age of Alice’s character and there were a lot of details/narrative that I felt were unnecessary and excessive.
It was the first book I’ve ever read with biromantic rep which I loved but overall the writing was not good and I felt it lacked in character development and plot development.
It was the first book I’ve ever read with biromantic rep which I loved but overall the writing was not good and I felt it lacked in character development and plot development.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia
Moderate: Racism and Sexual harassment
Minor: Panic attacks/disorders
dollys_island's review against another edition
4.25
Content Warnings
Moderate: Acephobia/Arophobia
Minor: Racism and Sexual harassment
aromarrie's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
lighthearted
medium-paced
4.25
01/20/21: this book made me smile so much, it actually hurt after a while.
unfortunately, i don’t have as much of a well-thought review as i would like reading this story the second time around. but i will say this: “let’s talk about love” is so incredibly charming and absolutely bursts with so much heart, it actually brought me close to tears because a story this good? it can get me through anything. and obviously that’s a stretch because who knows what life will throw at me?
but our main character, alice, is so bubbly, so affectionate, and she cares with all that she has. just like the people who are lucky enough to be in her orbit. and anyone who suggests otherwise just because of her sexuality needs to get a grip and check themselves. we all deal with her conflicts; the fact that this story didn’t just focus on romantic love but also platonic love, family love—that means the absolute world to me.
alice’s relationship with her parents, feenie & ryan, and takumi—they’re all so precious but there’s always faults that come with it. it was so uplifting to see how she also had to learn more things about herself and what she truly wants—for herself and in her relationships with the people she loves. small pieces here and there in the story as she was seeing a counselor was so beneficial for her and it just further made me root for her to find the happiness that she deserves.
i have a long way to go with my own happiness, but it just felt good to lie down late in night and see a character that felt so real to me find her own.
i can’t ever forget this story for that.
content warnings //: consumption of alcohol, acephobia, racism (against the main character, who is Black + also depicted in a past event recounted by another character who is East Asian), mention of cheating, and sexual harassment
unfortunately, i don’t have as much of a well-thought review as i would like reading this story the second time around. but i will say this: “let’s talk about love” is so incredibly charming and absolutely bursts with so much heart, it actually brought me close to tears because a story this good? it can get me through anything. and obviously that’s a stretch because who knows what life will throw at me?
but our main character, alice, is so bubbly, so affectionate, and she cares with all that she has. just like the people who are lucky enough to be in her orbit. and anyone who suggests otherwise just because of her sexuality needs to get a grip and check themselves. we all deal with her conflicts; the fact that this story didn’t just focus on romantic love but also platonic love, family love—that means the absolute world to me.
alice’s relationship with her parents, feenie & ryan, and takumi—they’re all so precious but there’s always faults that come with it. it was so uplifting to see how she also had to learn more things about herself and what she truly wants—for herself and in her relationships with the people she loves. small pieces here and there in the story as she was seeing a counselor was so beneficial for her and it just further made me root for her to find the happiness that she deserves.
i have a long way to go with my own happiness, but it just felt good to lie down late in night and see a character that felt so real to me find her own.
i can’t ever forget this story for that.
content warnings //: consumption of alcohol, acephobia, racism (against the main character, who is Black + also depicted in a past event recounted by another character who is East Asian), mention of cheating, and sexual harassment
Content Warnings
Moderate: Acephobia/Arophobia and Alcohol
Minor: Infidelity, Racism, and Sexual harassment
mxbluet18's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
lighthearted
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Trigger warnings for Let's Talk About Love include: ableist language; acephobia, alcohol, anxiety, assault, bullying, cheating (both past and mentioned); manipulation, microaggressions, racism, sexism, sexual harassment and toxic friendship.
☆
☆
☢Old Review ☢
This book made me cry at least 3 times in the space of about 10 minutes, and if that isn't ringing endorsement then I don't know what is. But seriously, this book explained things about me that I haven't yet had the words to explain. And it gave me some much needed ace representation. I loved it from start to finish, and I read it cover to cover in two days. The characters are relatable and real in a way that writer's don't always manage and that's in part what made me love this book so much. I also loved that this book subtly tackled and removed the stereotypes around being queer, and ace specifically, as well as the racial stereotypes of being black, and Japanese. Obviously there are some issues, namely Margot and Feenie, and those are never addressed, but overall, for me, this book was incredible.
~
☢New Review☢
I loved this book just as much as the first time I read it. I believe it was the first book I read with asexual representation, and it put words to feelings I couldn't describe for myself. I love how it discussed the stereotypes asexual people have to deal with, but how it also gave the best example of what you should do when someone comes out as ace, and the things you shouldn't say.
~
That's not to say that there aren't also the opposite examples too, of the typical things people say to asexuals, and the things that make someone feel guilty or ashamed for the identity, but those, for me are far overshadowed by Takumi and the way he handled Alice telling him.
☆
☆
☢Old Review ☢
This book made me cry at least 3 times in the space of about 10 minutes, and if that isn't ringing endorsement then I don't know what is. But seriously, this book explained things about me that I haven't yet had the words to explain. And it gave me some much needed ace representation. I loved it from start to finish, and I read it cover to cover in two days. The characters are relatable and real in a way that writer's don't always manage and that's in part what made me love this book so much. I also loved that this book subtly tackled and removed the stereotypes around being queer, and ace specifically, as well as the racial stereotypes of being black, and Japanese. Obviously there are some issues, namely Margot and Feenie, and those are never addressed, but overall, for me, this book was incredible.
~
☢New Review☢
I loved this book just as much as the first time I read it. I believe it was the first book I read with asexual representation, and it put words to feelings I couldn't describe for myself. I love how it discussed the stereotypes asexual people have to deal with, but how it also gave the best example of what you should do when someone comes out as ace, and the things you shouldn't say.
~
That's not to say that there aren't also the opposite examples too, of the typical things people say to asexuals, and the things that make someone feel guilty or ashamed for the identity, but those, for me are far overshadowed by Takumi and the way he handled Alice telling him.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Ableism, Bullying, Sexual assault, Acephobia/Arophobia, Alcohol, and Sexual harassment
Minor: Racism and Sexism
melaniereadsbooks's review against another edition
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
This was a super cute and fast, character-driven read! I really liked Alice and how she learned about herself throughout the book. I loved the discussions of asexuality and showing a character who wants love and romance but not sex. I thought this did a good job explaining how asexual people can still love someone just as much as an allosexual person! That being said, this book didn't have a ton of a plot, and not much happened other than Alice just figuring things out.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia
Minor: Racism and Sexual harassment