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undisciplinedbeing's review against another edition
5.0
Minor: Medical trauma, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Forced institutionalization, Genocide, Gaslighting, Hate crime, Homophobia, Sexual assault, Chronic illness, Abandonment, Death of parent, Domestic abuse, Grief, Ableism, Child abuse, Child death, Death, Medical content, Racism, Colonisation, Classism, Physical abuse, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Racial slurs, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, and Xenophobia
natashaleighton_'s review
4.0
Graphic: Death of parent, Misogyny, Racism, Sexual assault, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Sexism, Homophobia, Racial slurs, Sexual violence, and Schizophrenia/Psychosis
Minor: Toxic relationship and War
parasolcrafter's review
5.0
Graphic: Confinement, Rape, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Colonisation, Genocide, Physical abuse, Racism, Sexual violence, Violence, Classism, Self harm, Sexism, Sexual assault, Misogyny, Ableism, Child abuse, Racial slurs, Death, Death of parent, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Grief, Mental illness, Murder, War, and Suicide attempt
Moderate: Homophobia
lilcubana31's review against another edition
4.0
Graphic: Racism
Moderate: Sexual assault, Mental illness, Xenophobia, Suicide attempt, Rape, War, Sexual violence, Sexism, and Schizophrenia/Psychosis
Minor: Domestic abuse
erebus53's review against another edition
3.25
This is a story written primarily about a woman's personal investigation and fixation on learning about her mother, the Korean War, and intergenerational trauma of children of (for want of a less problematic term) mixed parentage living in small-town USA. As her mother is not literate, is schizophrenic, and is a trauma sufferer, much of the book was written around her, without consulting her, and without her having read it. In fact, the book was not published before her mother died. I could see how other family members might be angry at having been talked about or having the personal stories and vulnerable moments divulged as part of a story that is ultimately a saleable commodity, and without their permission.
Much of the book is written in the broad strokes of the Sociological lens, and has been pinned to an idea of a mother that the author could never fully know as an adult. I think that is a real feeling for many people who lose a parent young, and I know that personally I have continued learning more about my mother's context growing up, as I have aged myself. From my experience I agree that it's frustrating to not have that person in your life any more, when you are finally an adult. It's good that she managed to finally bond with her mother over the foods that had connection to her cultural influences. It's a little unfortunate that it feels like some of the conclusions that she expresses about her mother's experiences are conjecture, and fit a useful narrative while having little direct tie to who her mother was.
Wish I enjoyed the story more; wish I had learned more, but rather this was a harsh story about survivors of war and sexual exploitation, and a family that has all suffered because of an inability to overcome ingrained prejudices, mental illness, and the messiness of life. It's all a bit exhausting.
Graphic: Sexual violence, Violence, Misogyny, War, Grief, Kidnapping, Physical abuse, Racism, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Sexism, Bullying, Xenophobia, Domestic abuse, Abandonment, Alcohol, Animal death, Blood, Drug use, Mental illness, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, Child death, Colonisation, Chronic illness, Death, Death of parent, Pedophilia, and Racial slurs
ecn's review against another edition
5.0
Graphic: War, Slavery, Suicide, Torture, Racism, Genocide, Sexual violence, Biphobia, Colonisation, Confinement, Death, Death of parent, Domestic abuse, Murder, Police brutality, Violence, Rape, Chronic illness, Forced institutionalization, Grief, Hate crime, Homophobia, Mental illness, Racial slurs, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Sexual assault, Terminal illness, Suicide attempt, Trafficking, Xenophobia, and Suicidal thoughts
atsundarsingh's review
4.5
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Misogyny, Racism, Rape, Sexual content, Bullying, Homophobia, Medical trauma, Colonisation, Classism, Death of parent, Death, Hate crime, Infidelity, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Sexism, Sexual harassment, Domestic abuse, Excrement, Grief, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Trafficking, Violence, War, Xenophobia, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Slavery, and Suicide attempt
amanda_marie's review
4.75
Graphic: Colonisation, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Death of parent, Sexual violence, Slavery, Suicide attempt, and Sexism
Moderate: Racism, Racial slurs, and Sexual assault
jayisreading's review against another edition
3.5
To focus on something I really appreciated about this book, it’s the particularly intimate connection you make with your immigrant mother through food. Being Korean like the author, a lot of the dishes she mentioned and made were familiar ones that made this book tug at my heartstrings. It made me reflect a lot on my own relationship with my mother and how so much of my bonding with her happened in the kitchen, supermarkets, restaurants, and other spaces where food was at the front and center. Words of love and care were expressed with questions like “Have you eaten?” or “What have you been eating these days?” Or conversations would end with some variation of “Make sure you eat well.” There were many occasions when these food passages came up that I wanted to call my mother (but couldn’t because it would be far too late at night).
I think there are a lot of interesting things to take away from this book, but it deserves to be read with a critical lens.
Graphic: Racism and War
Moderate: Colonisation, Domestic abuse, and Sexual assault
Minor: Suicide, Suicide attempt, Hate crime, and Homophobia
kattyenn's review
4.5
Graphic: War, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Racism, Colonisation, Death of parent, and Grief
Moderate: Sexual assault, Xenophobia, Suicide attempt, Sexual harassment, and Bullying
Minor: Forced institutionalization