Reviews tagging 'Sexual assault'

Tastes Like War by Grace M. Cho

20 reviews

undisciplinedbeing's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective sad fast-paced

5.0

I never thought this would be a rollercoaster of emotions when I picked this book out. This was so much needed after a reading slump, because on top of retelling of her mom's struggle, Grace slipped in a bit of research on history that I appreciate so much. I highly recommend this book :)

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natashaleighton_'s review

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emotional reflective medium-paced

4.0


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parasolcrafter's review

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challenging emotional informative reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

as always, it's a tad bit odd for me to add my thoughts to a memoir and this one is especially hard because it not only deals with the author herself, but with the authors mother in a deeply intimate way. i cant even begin to imagine how hard it must have been to write this book.

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lilcubana31's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny informative reflective sad medium-paced

4.0


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erebus53's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

3.25

I think that memoirs, in general, tend to be self-indulgent therapy pieces; that's not to say that they aren't valuable to society and one could argue that we have been inundated by memoirs of rich white men for generations, and we get something out of hearing the stories of a variety of different people. I'm going to admit that my opinion of this writing was coloured by an online review that I stumbled upon, that purports to have been submitted by the brother of the author. This gave me many complex feelings about the nature of telling Our Story, when it is basically the stories of the people we have been surrounded by and interacted with during our lives.

This is a story written primarily about a woman's personal investigation and fixation on learning about her mother, the Korean War, and intergenerational trauma of children of (for want of a less problematic term) mixed parentage living in small-town USA. As her mother is not literate, is schizophrenic, and is a trauma sufferer, much of the book was written around her, without consulting her, and without her having read it. In fact, the book was not published before her mother died. I could see how other family members might be angry at having been talked about or having the personal stories and vulnerable moments divulged as part of a story that is ultimately a saleable commodity, and without their permission.

Much of the book is written in the broad strokes of the Sociological lens, and has been pinned to an idea of a mother that the author could never fully know as an adult. I think that is a real feeling for many people who lose a parent young, and I know that personally I have continued learning more about my mother's context growing up, as I have aged myself. From my experience I agree that it's frustrating to not have that person in your life any more, when you are finally an adult. It's good that she managed to finally bond with her mother over the foods that had connection to her cultural influences. It's a little unfortunate that it feels like some of the conclusions that she expresses about her mother's experiences are conjecture, and fit a useful narrative while having little direct tie to who her mother was.

Wish I enjoyed the story more; wish I had learned more, but rather this was a harsh story about survivors of war and sexual exploitation, and a family that has all suffered because of an inability to overcome ingrained prejudices, mental illness, and the messiness of life. It's all a bit exhausting.

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ecn's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional informative reflective sad medium-paced

5.0


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atsundarsingh's review

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challenging dark emotional informative reflective sad medium-paced

4.5

I was so moved by this book, and learned so many things - about Korea, schizophrenia, US imperialism. I wish more memoirs like this came out more often, but the truth is, that is likely impossible, because the singular honesty and carefulness with which Cho crafted her story isn't something that just rolls off people easily. Heartily recommend, and I will totally be finding ways to weave this into my teaching and recommendations. 

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amanda_marie's review

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challenging dark emotional informative reflective sad tense medium-paced

4.75

Cho’s is a narrative that defies traditional linear storytelling. As much her mother’s story as it is her own, she includes historical information on the US occupation of Korea, Korean culture, and scientific research into schizophrenia, all culminating in an interdisciplinary dish that’s hard to put down. I feel more learned for having read it, but mostly I hope she feels some peace from having written it. 

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jayisreading's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective sad medium-paced

3.5

I’m aware that the author’s family have written very publicly about the veracity of this memoir in various comments and reviews on Goodreads. I read this memoir with that in mind, approaching it with some skepticism.

To focus on something I really appreciated about this book, it’s the particularly intimate connection you make with your immigrant mother through food. Being Korean like the author, a lot of the dishes she mentioned and made were familiar ones that made this book tug at my heartstrings. It made me reflect a lot on my own relationship with my mother and how so much of my bonding with her happened in the kitchen, supermarkets, restaurants, and other spaces where food was at the front and center. Words of love and care were expressed with questions like “Have you eaten?” or “What have you been eating these days?” Or conversations would end with some variation of “Make sure you eat well.” There were many occasions when these food passages came up that I wanted to call my mother (but couldn’t because it would be far too late at night).

Returning to that skepticism, though, I don’t think I even needed the warnings from Cho’s family to pick up on some of the issues in this memoir. I always had mixed feelings about abled authors writing about disabled/Mad people they personally know/knew, especially because the execution of the writing often comes off as knowing more than the individual with the lived experience. This was the case in this book, at least to me. There’s also the way memory works in strange ways. I thought it was interesting that Cho’s particularly vivid memories seemed too... vivid? I felt some creative liberties were taken for the sake of prose, which there isn’t anything wrong with, but considering the topic at hand, it felt a little disingenuous and rubbed me the wrong way. As a result, Cho’s mother read to me more like a fictional character and not a real person.

I think there are a lot of interesting things to take away from this book, but it deserves to be read with a critical lens.

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kattyenn's review

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emotional informative reflective medium-paced

4.5


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