crispycritter's reviews
359 reviews

Meet Me at Midnight by Max Monroe
Did not finish book. Stopped at 63%.

It’s just . . . Not good. I can turn my brain off and read pretty mindless books but this unfortunately fell below that minimum prose and character viability standard. Also the two authors really do not come off as girl’s girls. Avery is *John Ralfio voice* the wooooooooorst. Why? Because conflict. Juniper June’s reason for keeping her relationship with Beau a secret - her best friend since childhood Avery could not possibly be ok with her brother dating her best friend because that thought is “simple” but “in the female mind, it’s more complicated than that.” This drivel? In 2024? C’mon. Enough of these stereotypes. 

How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by KC Davis

5.0

One of the most validating and kind books I've ever read. I was not prepared for how much a book on cleaning my house would make me cry. This is essential reading for anyone who is neurodivergent, struggling with their mental health, or just in a tough season of life.

The Ornithologist's Field Guide to Love by India Holton
Did not finish book. Stopped at 64%.

I'm sad about this DNF. A book with a ton of promise that just felt like it was written for me - but turned out to be a poorly recylced Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries. Super wimsical on the surface and yet an overwhelmingly dense, sluggish reading experience? So dense the characters got lost in the excessive bird puns and silliness. I love bird puns, whimsy, and silliness in my books - but this just did not work for me. Frustrated with how I kept losing interest and it looks like a lot of other negative reviews feel the same way. Almost an excellent book with something indescribable missing.

Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre
Did not finish book. Stopped at 40%.

This is quite possibly the worst representation of femdom and I can’t for the life of me understand why this is recommended so often. A direct descendant of Fifty "I don't need safewords" Shades of Grey.

Dreaming of You by Lisa Kleypas

4.0

Really? Derek Craven is the Kleypas hero y’all are so thirsty about? Ug. After meeting Sebastian Lord St Vincent and Cam Rohan my only comment is HOW DARE YOU. Also there is nothing you can do to convince me a cockney accent is hot. But it's still a Kleypas book, so yeah I had a pretty good time.

Then Came You by Lisa Kleypas

5.0

Super spicy take: Alex Raiford is far superior to Derek Craven. 

That child is going to need a lot of therapy.

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

5.0

Big words and boob jokes. If you think you know what's going on, you don't. All around a bangin time.

Barbarian Alien by Ruby Dixon

2.0

I read Ice Planet Barbarians last year and gaslit myself into thinking it wasn’t as bad as I remembered it being.

Narrator: It was.

Listen, there’s just better alien smut out there. All I’m sayin. The best we can imagine is ending up on a pre-industrial planet with no birth control, years long alien-human gestation, AND a symbiotic virus that makes us unable to resist that sweet blue alien downstairs mix up? AND we can't even run around outside and do fun activities because snow and bitey things? Take me baaaaack to capitalism, please. I am ready to lean in, align, and synergize without complaint till death takes me TYSM.

Not Another Love Song by Julie Soto

2.0

*sigh* another overhyped Reylo fanfic. When will I learn. 

Don't Kiss the Bride by Carian Cole
Did not finish book. Stopped at 60%.

This is some D+ writing here. I tried. Dear r/romancebooks, some of y’all’s taste is whack.