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4.0 AVERAGE
4.0 AVERAGE
dark
emotional
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
My reviews for Ashley’s books are always biased, but trust me when I say this book is the real deal if you love broken boys and hurt/comfort.
Here’s some insider information about SCaD that I don’t think will be a shock once you read it:
Bodhi means the world to Ashley.
And me. And (hopefully) everyone who reads this story, but more than anyone, to Ashley. A lot of his pain is her pain and that is tangible on the pages. It’s right there in front of you, screaming in ink to FEEL IT.
The ultimate broken boy, this story is Bodhi’s redemption arc within his own head. Haven’t we all been there in some shape or form? You feel yourself digging into the hole of your darkest thoughts but have no way to stop the depth from getting deeper. In Bodhi’s case, he had a few choices. He’d tried them all before but this time… this time he looks up and sees a hand reaching in to help him out. Jules. The man he should not want and cannot have.
There’s always the fear that he’s too much, his burdens and body too heavy. That the hole is too deep. That he’ll pull the person trying to help into the darkness with him. The weight of it all is suffocating - but Jules is used to getting what he wants, and what he wants is Bodhi. What Bodhi doesn’t see is that he’s rescuing Jules at the same time.
Sometimes being saved is having someone meet you where you are right at that moment and having them say that it’s enough. You’re enough.
Then you take a small step toward the light.
Merged review:
My reviews for Ashley’s books are always biased, but trust me when I say this book is the real deal if you love broken boys and hurt/comfort.
Here’s some insider information about SCaD that I don’t think will be a shock once you read it:
Bodhi means the world to Ashley.
And me. And (hopefully) everyone who reads this story, but more than anyone, to Ashley. A lot of his pain is her pain and that is tangible on the pages. It’s right there in front of you, screaming in ink to FEEL IT.
The ultimate broken boy, this story is Bodhi’s redemption arc within his own head. Haven’t we all been there in some shape or form? You feel yourself digging into the hole of your darkest thoughts but have no way to stop the depth from getting deeper. In Bodhi’s case, he had a few choices. He’d tried them all before but this time… this time he looks up and sees a hand reaching in to help him out. Jules. The man he should not want and cannot have.
There’s always the fear that he’s too much, his burdens and body too heavy. That the hole is too deep. That he’ll pull the person trying to help into the darkness with him. The weight of it all is suffocating - but Jules is used to getting what he wants, and what he wants is Bodhi. What Bodhi doesn’t see is that he’s rescuing Jules at the same time.
Sometimes being saved is having someone meet you where you are right at that moment and having them say that it’s enough. You’re enough.
Then you take a small step toward the light.
My heart broke for Bohdi. I loved him and Jules so much. They had so much chemistry. I loved that Jules never gave up on Bodhi. As much as the two of them were this story, it was really Bodhi's book and I loved seeing him finally get the help he needed to heal and move forward. I can't wait to see more about Elias next.
challenging
dark
emotional
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
It’s been a while since I have come out of book this shaken up. Bohdi went through so much. More than one person should have to go through. It tore me apart
I knew since Ashley James announced the release of this book that it was going to be painful, and when I started reading it, I thought I was ready. Not my first time with this author. But I was wrong. I was not prepared in the slightest.
From the beginning, from the first page, you are met with a deep despair. You can feel it, and touch it and you can even see it. After all, it’s a vast, dense, suffocating blackness. At this point, I had to stop for a while, and had only read the prologue. And while I was turning it over in my head, I was thinking: How can a person feel something like that? How could Bodhi surrender like this?
And so I kept reading, because I had to know.
I’m not going to go into detail about who Bodhi is or who Jules is, what they do, how they met, etc. You have to read the book to know them. I’m just going to say for some reason, fate or who knows what brought them back together and that changed the course of their lives. Bodhi was just storm and darkness and though Jules carries his own load, maybe that’s why he was able to get through the storm and “see” the real Bodhi behind him.
What Bodhi had to go through during his childhood, his adolescence and even his adulthood was what led him to feel hopeless, empty and useless. Worthless. Invisible. And not even the love of someone like Jules seemed enough to save him. But as always, when you hit bottom, you only have two options, stay there, or take the leap up, and if you have an outstretched hand waiting for you, ready to comfort you in the hardest moments, then you try to fight tooth and nail.
Ashley has an amazing way of making you feel what the MCs feel. Your heart races when theirs too, the butterflies fly in your stomach when they flutter in theirs and it’s like you can see through their eyes and hear their thoughts as if they were your own. And this is also how she shows you mental illness and trauma, and how they affects not only those who experience them but also those people around them, and she does it in a way that is deep and careful, but so vivid that it seems real (and I’m not just talking about this book).
I cried at the beginning with the prologue. I cried halfway through when I already knew something of Bodhi’s hell. But mostly I cried at the end. Such a beautiful ending. Such a beautiful words. They are just a few paragraphs, but they are worth the lives of many who once felt like Bodhi and even Jules once. I think that part should be framed and put in view of everyone everywhere, regardless of gender, race or religion. They are words of hope. Of survival. Of love.
I was given an advanced copy and voluntarily wrote a review.
Merged review:
I knew since Ashley James announced the release of this book that it was going to be painful, and when I started reading it, I thought I was ready. Not my first time with this author. But I was wrong. I was not prepared in the slightest.
From the beginning, from the first page, you are met with a deep despair. You can feel it, and touch it and you can even see it. After all, it’s a vast, dense, suffocating blackness. At this point, I had to stop for a while, and had only read the prologue. And while I was turning it over in my head, I was thinking: How can a person feel something like that? How could Bodhi surrender like this?
And so I kept reading, because I had to know.
I’m not going to go into detail about who Bodhi is or who Jules is, what they do, how they met, etc. You have to read the book to know them. I’m just going to say for some reason, fate or who knows what brought them back together and that changed the course of their lives. Bodhi was just storm and darkness and though Jules carries his own load, maybe that’s why he was able to get through the storm and “see” the real Bodhi behind him.
What Bodhi had to go through during his childhood, his adolescence and even his adulthood was what led him to feel hopeless, empty and useless. Worthless. Invisible. And not even the love of someone like Jules seemed enough to save him. But as always, when you hit bottom, you only have two options, stay there, or take the leap up, and if you have an outstretched hand waiting for you, ready to comfort you in the hardest moments, then you try to fight tooth and nail.
Ashley has an amazing way of making you feel what the MCs feel. Your heart races when theirs too, the butterflies fly in your stomach when they flutter in theirs and it’s like you can see through their eyes and hear their thoughts as if they were your own. And this is also how she shows you mental illness and trauma, and how they affects not only those who experience them but also those people around them, and she does it in a way that is deep and careful, but so vivid that it seems real (and I’m not just talking about this book).
I cried at the beginning with the prologue. I cried halfway through when I already knew something of Bodhi’s hell. But mostly I cried at the end. Such a beautiful ending. Such a beautiful words. They are just a few paragraphs, but they are worth the lives of many who once felt like Bodhi and even Jules once. I think that part should be framed and put in view of everyone everywhere, regardless of gender, race or religion. They are words of hope. Of survival. Of love.
I was given an advanced copy and voluntarily wrote a review.
From the beginning, from the first page, you are met with a deep despair. You can feel it, and touch it and you can even see it. After all, it’s a vast, dense, suffocating blackness. At this point, I had to stop for a while, and had only read the prologue. And while I was turning it over in my head, I was thinking: How can a person feel something like that? How could Bodhi surrender like this?
And so I kept reading, because I had to know.
I’m not going to go into detail about who Bodhi is or who Jules is, what they do, how they met, etc. You have to read the book to know them. I’m just going to say for some reason, fate or who knows what brought them back together and that changed the course of their lives. Bodhi was just storm and darkness and though Jules carries his own load, maybe that’s why he was able to get through the storm and “see” the real Bodhi behind him.
What Bodhi had to go through during his childhood, his adolescence and even his adulthood was what led him to feel hopeless, empty and useless. Worthless. Invisible. And not even the love of someone like Jules seemed enough to save him. But as always, when you hit bottom, you only have two options, stay there, or take the leap up, and if you have an outstretched hand waiting for you, ready to comfort you in the hardest moments, then you try to fight tooth and nail.
Ashley has an amazing way of making you feel what the MCs feel. Your heart races when theirs too, the butterflies fly in your stomach when they flutter in theirs and it’s like you can see through their eyes and hear their thoughts as if they were your own. And this is also how she shows you mental illness and trauma, and how they affects not only those who experience them but also those people around them, and she does it in a way that is deep and careful, but so vivid that it seems real (and I’m not just talking about this book).
I cried at the beginning with the prologue. I cried halfway through when I already knew something of Bodhi’s hell. But mostly I cried at the end. Such a beautiful ending. Such a beautiful words. They are just a few paragraphs, but they are worth the lives of many who once felt like Bodhi and even Jules once. I think that part should be framed and put in view of everyone everywhere, regardless of gender, race or religion. They are words of hope. Of survival. Of love.
I was given an advanced copy and voluntarily wrote a review.
Merged review:
I knew since Ashley James announced the release of this book that it was going to be painful, and when I started reading it, I thought I was ready. Not my first time with this author. But I was wrong. I was not prepared in the slightest.
From the beginning, from the first page, you are met with a deep despair. You can feel it, and touch it and you can even see it. After all, it’s a vast, dense, suffocating blackness. At this point, I had to stop for a while, and had only read the prologue. And while I was turning it over in my head, I was thinking: How can a person feel something like that? How could Bodhi surrender like this?
And so I kept reading, because I had to know.
I’m not going to go into detail about who Bodhi is or who Jules is, what they do, how they met, etc. You have to read the book to know them. I’m just going to say for some reason, fate or who knows what brought them back together and that changed the course of their lives. Bodhi was just storm and darkness and though Jules carries his own load, maybe that’s why he was able to get through the storm and “see” the real Bodhi behind him.
What Bodhi had to go through during his childhood, his adolescence and even his adulthood was what led him to feel hopeless, empty and useless. Worthless. Invisible. And not even the love of someone like Jules seemed enough to save him. But as always, when you hit bottom, you only have two options, stay there, or take the leap up, and if you have an outstretched hand waiting for you, ready to comfort you in the hardest moments, then you try to fight tooth and nail.
Ashley has an amazing way of making you feel what the MCs feel. Your heart races when theirs too, the butterflies fly in your stomach when they flutter in theirs and it’s like you can see through their eyes and hear their thoughts as if they were your own. And this is also how she shows you mental illness and trauma, and how they affects not only those who experience them but also those people around them, and she does it in a way that is deep and careful, but so vivid that it seems real (and I’m not just talking about this book).
I cried at the beginning with the prologue. I cried halfway through when I already knew something of Bodhi’s hell. But mostly I cried at the end. Such a beautiful ending. Such a beautiful words. They are just a few paragraphs, but they are worth the lives of many who once felt like Bodhi and even Jules once. I think that part should be framed and put in view of everyone everywhere, regardless of gender, race or religion. They are words of hope. Of survival. Of love.
I was given an advanced copy and voluntarily wrote a review.
dark
emotional
sad
tense
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt
Moderate: Drug use
I don't get the hype honestly.
The execution of everything in ths book was superficial, from the trauma to the angst to the relationship development.
The ILYs came out of NOWHERE and then the ending felt so rushed it gave me whiplash.
The execution of everything in ths book was superficial, from the trauma to the angst to the relationship development.
The ILYs came out of NOWHERE and then the ending felt so rushed it gave me whiplash.
Wow. Just wow. What an emotional ride this book took me on.
5 HUGE STARS for Bodhi and Jules.
If you read Brazen Affairs, you will know that Bodhi keeps to himself and isn't the most social. We also saw the prologue in that last book, so we knew what was coming for him.
Bodhi has dealt with depression, an eating disorder, and suicidal thoughts for the majority of his life. Due to childhood trauma that still continues to this day. Reading all of that on page was absolutely heartbreaking.
So Bodhi became an escort because it gives him the power back and allows him to feel seen. Through the escorting, he is scheduled for a dinner with a man named Jules. When he shows up, Jules is actually his ex-best friend from his childhood's father. Immediately he is on edge and wants nothing to do with this interaction. Especially given that Jules is married to a women that he has been with for all of Bodhi's life.
But Jules does not let Bodhi go - he is persistent in meeting with him and sweet where he doesn't push him to do anything that he doesn't want to.
When they finally get together, their spice is so off the charts!
Even with Jules being the amazing guy that he is, Bodhi still never feels whole and feels that there is something wrong with him. When Bodhi goes down into his deep hole, it is so sad. We seem his struggle and get to his lowest low. All I wanted to do was jump through the pages and give him a big hug.
While Bodhi is going through that, Jules is going through his own heartbreaks in his life. I don't want to spoil anything, but there are some really sad scenes that happen for him as well.
There are so many things that I want to say, but I don't want to ruin anything. Let me just say, this book is a tough read, but 100% worth it. I hope that everyone who feels the way Bodhi does, has a Jules in their life. We as the reader couldn't have asked for a better partner for Bodhi. Jules really does complete him.
Looking forward to Elliot's book next!
Merged review:
Wow. Just wow. What an emotional ride this book took me on.
5 HUGE STARS for Bodhi and Jules.
If you read Brazen Affairs, you will know that Bodhi keeps to himself and isn't the most social. We also saw the prologue in that last book, so we knew what was coming for him.
Bodhi has dealt with depression, an eating disorder, and suicidal thoughts for the majority of his life. Due to childhood trauma that still continues to this day. Reading all of that on page was absolutely heartbreaking.
So Bodhi became an escort because it gives him the power back and allows him to feel seen. Through the escorting, he is scheduled for a dinner with a man named Jules. When he shows up, Jules is actually his ex-best friend from his childhood's father. Immediately he is on edge and wants nothing to do with this interaction. Especially given that Jules is married to a women that he has been with for all of Bodhi's life.
But Jules does not let Bodhi go - he is persistent in meeting with him and sweet where he doesn't push him to do anything that he doesn't want to.
When they finally get together, their spice is so off the charts!
Even with Jules being the amazing guy that he is, Bodhi still never feels whole and feels that there is something wrong with him. When Bodhi goes down into his deep hole, it is so sad. We seem his struggle and get to his lowest low. All I wanted to do was jump through the pages and give him a big hug.
While Bodhi is going through that, Jules is going through his own heartbreaks in his life. I don't want to spoil anything, but there are some really sad scenes that happen for him as well.
There are so many things that I want to say, but I don't want to ruin anything. Let me just say, this book is a tough read, but 100% worth it. I hope that everyone who feels the way Bodhi does, has a Jules in their life. We as the reader couldn't have asked for a better partner for Bodhi. Jules really does complete him.
Looking forward to Elliot's book next!
5 HUGE STARS for Bodhi and Jules.
If you read Brazen Affairs, you will know that Bodhi keeps to himself and isn't the most social. We also saw the prologue in that last book, so we knew what was coming for him.
Bodhi has dealt with depression, an eating disorder, and suicidal thoughts for the majority of his life. Due to childhood trauma that still continues to this day. Reading all of that on page was absolutely heartbreaking.
So Bodhi became an escort because it gives him the power back and allows him to feel seen. Through the escorting, he is scheduled for a dinner with a man named Jules. When he shows up, Jules is actually his ex-best friend from his childhood's father. Immediately he is on edge and wants nothing to do with this interaction. Especially given that Jules is married to a women that he has been with for all of Bodhi's life.
But Jules does not let Bodhi go - he is persistent in meeting with him and sweet where he doesn't push him to do anything that he doesn't want to.
When they finally get together, their spice is so off the charts!
Even with Jules being the amazing guy that he is, Bodhi still never feels whole and feels that there is something wrong with him. When Bodhi goes down into his deep hole, it is so sad. We seem his struggle and get to his lowest low. All I wanted to do was jump through the pages and give him a big hug.
While Bodhi is going through that, Jules is going through his own heartbreaks in his life. I don't want to spoil anything, but there are some really sad scenes that happen for him as well.
There are so many things that I want to say, but I don't want to ruin anything. Let me just say, this book is a tough read, but 100% worth it. I hope that everyone who feels the way Bodhi does, has a Jules in their life. We as the reader couldn't have asked for a better partner for Bodhi. Jules really does complete him.
Looking forward to Elliot's book next!
Merged review:
Wow. Just wow. What an emotional ride this book took me on.
5 HUGE STARS for Bodhi and Jules.
If you read Brazen Affairs, you will know that Bodhi keeps to himself and isn't the most social. We also saw the prologue in that last book, so we knew what was coming for him.
Bodhi has dealt with depression, an eating disorder, and suicidal thoughts for the majority of his life. Due to childhood trauma that still continues to this day. Reading all of that on page was absolutely heartbreaking.
So Bodhi became an escort because it gives him the power back and allows him to feel seen. Through the escorting, he is scheduled for a dinner with a man named Jules. When he shows up, Jules is actually his ex-best friend from his childhood's father. Immediately he is on edge and wants nothing to do with this interaction. Especially given that Jules is married to a women that he has been with for all of Bodhi's life.
But Jules does not let Bodhi go - he is persistent in meeting with him and sweet where he doesn't push him to do anything that he doesn't want to.
When they finally get together, their spice is so off the charts!
Even with Jules being the amazing guy that he is, Bodhi still never feels whole and feels that there is something wrong with him. When Bodhi goes down into his deep hole, it is so sad. We seem his struggle and get to his lowest low. All I wanted to do was jump through the pages and give him a big hug.
While Bodhi is going through that, Jules is going through his own heartbreaks in his life. I don't want to spoil anything, but there are some really sad scenes that happen for him as well.
There are so many things that I want to say, but I don't want to ruin anything. Let me just say, this book is a tough read, but 100% worth it. I hope that everyone who feels the way Bodhi does, has a Jules in their life. We as the reader couldn't have asked for a better partner for Bodhi. Jules really does complete him.
Looking forward to Elliot's book next!