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4.05 AVERAGE
4.05 AVERAGE
It would be great if I talk about if the book helped me to copy with depression or not (from reading POV, it was extremely readable and is targeted at wider-audience from different backgrounds).
Short answer: Yes, it did. In just 14 days my depression went from "severe depression" to "mild depression".
Long answer: Let me tell you my story with book. It's going to be vulnerable for me posting this in public.
-
11th Nov. 2019. My score was 54 on BDC - severe depression.
Few days ago, my friend had scolded me on why I make little progress and then come back to same point sabotaging myself, or why I don't do anything about depression.
I knew I needed psychological help, but wasn't comfortable going to go to a psychologist, frankly, I didn't have money either to afford therapy session at a private clinic.
So I decided to give this book a go which I had in my phone for some weeks, and said to myself if it doesn't help me in 14 days, I'll find a way to visit a psychologist.
I want to mention, I already better understanding of myself relative to other people because I have been reading or been into works of Abraham Maslow, Carl Jung, Jean Pigeat, Howard Gardener, Otto Rank, and many other psychologists a lot after graduation. I was just reading their theories/books or work just for fun, I was curious to learn about human behavior.
So I had the self-awareness that my problems related to depression are primarily psychoanalytical/emotional/ behavioral in nature, so didn't want to take any anti-depressants. They were related to my existential crisis after losing my faith in conventional sense in religion, and past-traumas or conflicted views of reality.
I want to add I was also started using Abbs's exercise most of days using an app, was meditating in Dhayan position using Headspace. I also started a habit of doing one "small task/sub-task that scares me most" from Todoist tasks I had set for myself night before.
I was tracking these habits using HabitBull app otherwise I wouldn't be able to keep up with them.
I was already using Bullet Journal (I have an analog version of it and have created also digital version of it in Zoho Notebook app) to brain dump my suicidal thoughts in it. I created a separate Collection for therapy.
This is how my Todoist task looked like for therapy every day, I tossed everything into one task in the app rather than making sub-tasks in Todoist:
"Write in antiprocrastination sheet (1-Write the activity I'm putting off/break it down into small steps. 2-Write predicted difficulty/ satisfaction 3.-Write actual difficulty/satisfaction). 2-Write 1 thing in Pleasure Prediction Sheet. 3- Write thing for a guilt-should thought (1. Write down guilty dysfunctional thought 2. Write cognitive distortion to it 3. Write a rational response to it and after-emotions 4. Write 1 advantage/disadvantages of having this should-rule in Double Column) 4-Write 3 thing in Activity Schedule 5-Write in Triple column (1-Write date and before emotions 2-Write thought+distortion+response 3-Write after emotions) 6-Write 1 advantage for something I'm putting off --- 35 mins"
Note: I wrote 1 thing since I said I would do just small thing, I didn't have to deal with all my dysfunctional thoughts at once. I found triple column technique,pleasure prediction sheet, and anti-procrastination sheet to be most useful for me.
-
24th Nov. 2019. My BDC score was 24 - mild depression.
I felt much better at this point and decided to continue therapy.
I found an amazing insight which I think came out probably due to therapy.
I realized from 2006 to 2019 I developed crushes on pretty women every 6 months or after a year. And in doing so I was looking for these things sub-consciously: that feminine, motherly unconditional love, kindness, compassion, sharing of deep emotional bonded connection with another human being.
The reason for this probably was emotional unavailability of one of my parents in childhood, and inconsistency in behavior of my other parent who would show affection toward me in one moment and sit at me and beat the shit out of me in next. I developed fear of abandonment due to this (I'm saying this because of my understanding of Attachment Theory and patterns I found in my own behavior in relationships with other people). And maybe that's why I was looking for this unconditional love absent from my inconsistent parent in another woman in some other form all those years.
I decided to then give this unconditional love in form of self-care, self-empowerment, kindness, compassion, and friendship to myself for next one year and not chasing any friend or woman. I'll reflect how this challenge goes on 30th Dec,2020. Let's see how this year of moving myself to self-care, self-empowerment, self-compassion, self-actualization (in Maslow's words) and Individuation (in Jung's words) goes.
I also found I had fear of entrapment which probably developed in childhood as well. I recalled how I started new things instead of pushing through Dips many times (as described in Seth Godin's Dip) when jobs/projects/relationships got difficult.
I had this fear of entrapment, and was aware of it but couldn't decide why and how it affected my growth as a person. I feared being trapped in relationships/jobs/projects/relationships/society etc. etc. But now I have started growing past it
-
8th Dec. 2019. My BDC score was 14 - mild depression.
I felt much better and made progress on goals I had set for last month.
-
17th Dec. 2019. My BDC score is 7 as I checked before writing this - normal but unhappy (just little short of 2 numbers to be happy, haha).
I feel much better. I'm continuing therapy and probably won't visit psychologist. I'm also gonna continue pushing through and growing through my fears.
-
This book was extremely helpful.
Short answer: Yes, it did. In just 14 days my depression went from "severe depression" to "mild depression".
Long answer: Let me tell you my story with book. It's going to be vulnerable for me posting this in public.
-
11th Nov. 2019. My score was 54 on BDC - severe depression.
Few days ago, my friend had scolded me on why I make little progress and then come back to same point sabotaging myself, or why I don't do anything about depression.
I knew I needed psychological help, but wasn't comfortable going to go to a psychologist, frankly, I didn't have money either to afford therapy session at a private clinic.
So I decided to give this book a go which I had in my phone for some weeks, and said to myself if it doesn't help me in 14 days, I'll find a way to visit a psychologist.
I want to mention, I already better understanding of myself relative to other people because I have been reading or been into works of Abraham Maslow, Carl Jung, Jean Pigeat, Howard Gardener, Otto Rank, and many other psychologists a lot after graduation. I was just reading their theories/books or work just for fun, I was curious to learn about human behavior.
So I had the self-awareness that my problems related to depression are primarily psychoanalytical/emotional/ behavioral in nature, so didn't want to take any anti-depressants. They were related to my existential crisis after losing my faith in conventional sense in religion, and past-traumas or conflicted views of reality.
I want to add I was also started using Abbs's exercise most of days using an app, was meditating in Dhayan position using Headspace. I also started a habit of doing one "small task/sub-task that scares me most" from Todoist tasks I had set for myself night before.
I was tracking these habits using HabitBull app otherwise I wouldn't be able to keep up with them.
I was already using Bullet Journal (I have an analog version of it and have created also digital version of it in Zoho Notebook app) to brain dump my suicidal thoughts in it. I created a separate Collection for therapy.
This is how my Todoist task looked like for therapy every day, I tossed everything into one task in the app rather than making sub-tasks in Todoist:
"Write in antiprocrastination sheet (1-Write the activity I'm putting off/break it down into small steps. 2-Write predicted difficulty/ satisfaction 3.-Write actual difficulty/satisfaction). 2-Write 1 thing in Pleasure Prediction Sheet. 3- Write thing for a guilt-should thought (1. Write down guilty dysfunctional thought 2. Write cognitive distortion to it 3. Write a rational response to it and after-emotions 4. Write 1 advantage/disadvantages of having this should-rule in Double Column) 4-Write 3 thing in Activity Schedule 5-Write in Triple column (1-Write date and before emotions 2-Write thought+distortion+response 3-Write after emotions) 6-Write 1 advantage for something I'm putting off --- 35 mins"
Note: I wrote 1 thing since I said I would do just small thing, I didn't have to deal with all my dysfunctional thoughts at once. I found triple column technique,pleasure prediction sheet, and anti-procrastination sheet to be most useful for me.
-
24th Nov. 2019. My BDC score was 24 - mild depression.
I felt much better at this point and decided to continue therapy.
I found an amazing insight which I think came out probably due to therapy.
I realized from 2006 to 2019 I developed crushes on pretty women every 6 months or after a year. And in doing so I was looking for these things sub-consciously: that feminine, motherly unconditional love, kindness, compassion, sharing of deep emotional bonded connection with another human being.
The reason for this probably was emotional unavailability of one of my parents in childhood, and inconsistency in behavior of my other parent who would show affection toward me in one moment and sit at me and beat the shit out of me in next. I developed fear of abandonment due to this (I'm saying this because of my understanding of Attachment Theory and patterns I found in my own behavior in relationships with other people). And maybe that's why I was looking for this unconditional love absent from my inconsistent parent in another woman in some other form all those years.
I decided to then give this unconditional love in form of self-care, self-empowerment, kindness, compassion, and friendship to myself for next one year and not chasing any friend or woman. I'll reflect how this challenge goes on 30th Dec,2020. Let's see how this year of moving myself to self-care, self-empowerment, self-compassion, self-actualization (in Maslow's words) and Individuation (in Jung's words) goes.
I also found I had fear of entrapment which probably developed in childhood as well. I recalled how I started new things instead of pushing through Dips many times (as described in Seth Godin's Dip) when jobs/projects/relationships got difficult.
I had this fear of entrapment, and was aware of it but couldn't decide why and how it affected my growth as a person. I feared being trapped in relationships/jobs/projects/relationships/society etc. etc. But now I have started growing past it
-
8th Dec. 2019. My BDC score was 14 - mild depression.
I felt much better and made progress on goals I had set for last month.
-
17th Dec. 2019. My BDC score is 7 as I checked before writing this - normal but unhappy (just little short of 2 numbers to be happy, haha).
I feel much better. I'm continuing therapy and probably won't visit psychologist. I'm also gonna continue pushing through and growing through my fears.
-
This book was extremely helpful.
Extremely helpful, but at the end there was a LOT of neurochemical, brain structure, and drug therapy information that wasn't helpful to me as someone who was mainly interested in the strategies of the previous chapters. Helpful for reinforcing and broadening my knowledge of CBT, though admittedly with some outdated approaches to relationships and women's roles and needs. Cut away the fluff and silliness and there are a lot of good tools here you can use for yourself. I'm interested in the upcoming "Feeling Great" book by Dr. Burns because I'm hoping it will have more of the helpful bits and less of the chaff.
I actually have two ratings for this book!
Rating 1: ⭐️⭐️
The writing is boring tbh. I found myself skipping over the things that don’t apply to me bc I’m really not interested. It’s not a story so it isn’t good enough to keep me entertained thru those parts.
But... and that’s a big but..
Rating 2: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This book has changed my life. Depression is the most difficult thing to explain to someone who doesn’t experience it, and as I’ve found from reading (and not reading parts of) this book, it looks different for everyone.
Who would have thought such a simple concept for talking back to yourself and not always perceiving your feelings as fact would be such a game changer?
When you’re in the throes of it, and you have read this book or possess knowledge of CBT, the method of writing down your defeating thoughts then following that with a rational talk down wouldn’t occur to you.
You’ll need to read the book to understand that^^
I have a lot more I could say, but I’ll finish with this...
It seems as though my thoughts have put down their weapons, gathered in a circle as a community, and set their sights on the common good for the body they inhabit.
I am finally not afraid of the lows, or even the highs because they mean a drop is coming, because I FINALLY possess the coping mechanisms to rid myself of them.
Rating 1: ⭐️⭐️
The writing is boring tbh. I found myself skipping over the things that don’t apply to me bc I’m really not interested. It’s not a story so it isn’t good enough to keep me entertained thru those parts.
But... and that’s a big but..
Rating 2: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This book has changed my life. Depression is the most difficult thing to explain to someone who doesn’t experience it, and as I’ve found from reading (and not reading parts of) this book, it looks different for everyone.
Who would have thought such a simple concept for talking back to yourself and not always perceiving your feelings as fact would be such a game changer?
When you’re in the throes of it, and you have read this book or possess knowledge of CBT, the method of writing down your defeating thoughts then following that with a rational talk down wouldn’t occur to you.
You’ll need to read the book to understand that^^
I have a lot more I could say, but I’ll finish with this...
It seems as though my thoughts have put down their weapons, gathered in a circle as a community, and set their sights on the common good for the body they inhabit.
I am finally not afraid of the lows, or even the highs because they mean a drop is coming, because I FINALLY possess the coping mechanisms to rid myself of them.
Literally everyone needs to read this. It should be handed out in junior high schools worldwide. There's a lot in this book that will help if you've been in CBT (which was directly developed from this research), and if you've never had therapy, this book is the seed thereof.
I can now proudly add a self-help book to the list of books I’ve read! Self-help is one of those genres I’ve never read. Until now, at least. Because I haven’t read many self-help books, I don’t have a metric to base this book on, other than the wildly different genres I’ve read.
Feeling good is an excellent book about depression. Though, I suppose it’s more about the negative thoughts that we have and how they impair our thinking. Unfortunately, these automatic thought processes run rampant in our society. For some reason, we’ve managed to declare these negative thoughts to be the ideal mind space for a successful person. Humanity has a tendency to make things worse for ourselves when it comes to how we should think. For example, talent. There’s this idea that whatever you have a natural ability for is what you should do with the rest of your life. People with an artistic ability should only be artists-and to be anything else would be wrong, somehow. It’s not just artistic ability, and it’s not just ‘talent’ that falls victim to these incorrect perceptions about the human experience.
As I read this book, I realized how our thoughts control our lives, and how we convince ourselves that it’s not our thoughts that are making our experience for the worse. I thought I was remarkably functional, but this book pointed out many of the thoughts that I have had that impair my day-to-day life. For instance, the all-or-nothing thinking. I wasn’t aware of how often I exaggerate my thoughts. After reading the first few chapters, I took note of how much I exaggerated things in my life that were, in reality, not as bad as I thought.
I appreciated how scientific it was. The analysis of thoughts was comforting and made sense out of common thought processes for depression.
I did, however, grow bored with the section on drug use. The first half of the book, which was about negative thoughts and how to change them, was much more interesting than the section on anti-depressants. But other than that, Feeling good definitely made an impression on me. I hope to try some of the ideas in this book!
Feeling good is an excellent book about depression. Though, I suppose it’s more about the negative thoughts that we have and how they impair our thinking. Unfortunately, these automatic thought processes run rampant in our society. For some reason, we’ve managed to declare these negative thoughts to be the ideal mind space for a successful person. Humanity has a tendency to make things worse for ourselves when it comes to how we should think. For example, talent. There’s this idea that whatever you have a natural ability for is what you should do with the rest of your life. People with an artistic ability should only be artists-and to be anything else would be wrong, somehow. It’s not just artistic ability, and it’s not just ‘talent’ that falls victim to these incorrect perceptions about the human experience.
As I read this book, I realized how our thoughts control our lives, and how we convince ourselves that it’s not our thoughts that are making our experience for the worse. I thought I was remarkably functional, but this book pointed out many of the thoughts that I have had that impair my day-to-day life. For instance, the all-or-nothing thinking. I wasn’t aware of how often I exaggerate my thoughts. After reading the first few chapters, I took note of how much I exaggerated things in my life that were, in reality, not as bad as I thought.
I appreciated how scientific it was. The analysis of thoughts was comforting and made sense out of common thought processes for depression.
I did, however, grow bored with the section on drug use. The first half of the book, which was about negative thoughts and how to change them, was much more interesting than the section on anti-depressants. But other than that, Feeling good definitely made an impression on me. I hope to try some of the ideas in this book!
This is definitely a book that you will need to come back to, but also one that gives a ton of great and applicable information.
One of the biggest takeaways for me has been to be more cognizant of my negative thoughts, to see things for what they really are is actually much harder than I ever realized.
Don't expect some miracle cure, but if you are willing to put in the work this is such a great tool.
One of the biggest takeaways for me has been to be more cognizant of my negative thoughts, to see things for what they really are is actually much harder than I ever realized.
Don't expect some miracle cure, but if you are willing to put in the work this is such a great tool.
informative
slow-paced
low rating because i felt like this book was incredibly outdated. i was especially bothered by the "enlightened manipulation" section where he seemed to be suggesting that women should win back their cheating spouses by never making them feel uncomfortable ever? like hold everything in and never bring up things that bother you in the relationship or he's justfied in running out on you with another woman?
there was another section in the same chapter where he told a woman who was upset that her husband cheated on her that she needed to see where he was coming from and see that he had no option but to cheat on her? it just seemed incredibly backward and looked more like instructions on how to get caught up in an unhealthy and abusive relationship to me.
additionally, he kept trying to throw doubt on the fact that chemical imbalances and brain-related issues affect depression. maybe that's just a symptom of how old this book is, but he really should think about updating or revising again with more up-to-date information. it feels pretty misleading for him to continue to promote this work when it doesn't take into account more recent studies and research.
there was another section in the same chapter where he told a woman who was upset that her husband cheated on her that she needed to see where he was coming from and see that he had no option but to cheat on her? it just seemed incredibly backward and looked more like instructions on how to get caught up in an unhealthy and abusive relationship to me.
additionally, he kept trying to throw doubt on the fact that chemical imbalances and brain-related issues affect depression. maybe that's just a symptom of how old this book is, but he really should think about updating or revising again with more up-to-date information. it feels pretty misleading for him to continue to promote this work when it doesn't take into account more recent studies and research.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Misogyny, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Grief, Suicide attempt
informative
reflective
slow-paced
Took me almost half a year to finish this - not because it was too slow or difficult, but because it’s a book that truly requires a lot of active reflection. This book explains in detail the theory and practical strategies for CBT for daily living, from the background of a psychiatrist.
In my opinion, everyone and anyone could benefit from understanding the principles of CBT. Every human on this planet has unfairly talked down to themselves, experienced a pattern of distorted thinking, procrastinated on something they shouldn’t have, had a bad day they blew out of proportion, etc. I wasn’t particularly looking for strategies for myself when I picked up this book, but I actually find myself using its ideas on a regular basis. Even though my life right now isn’t too stressful or anything, I still can benefit from dismantling illogical thoughts. And my days are a little smoother for it.
It’s not a particularly flashy or fancy book (plus it’s hella long), but it’s one that’s grounded in solid practical strategies for reshaping your automatic negative thoughts. Unlike its sexier self-help counterparts, it’s very practical and simple. However, it’s not a book that you can just read through in one gulp - you need to actually think about times where you’ve made certain mistakes, and illogical patterns of thinking. If you don’t take the time to reflect and be honest with yourself, you’ll gain nothing from CBT and dismiss is it as common sense.
To me, it’s like reading a book on how to ride a bicycle versus actually trying out a bicycle.
You need to take the time to match the theory with action. Or it just won’t help.
At the end, the author goes through more of the medicine around mood stabilization and some (fairly outdated) data on pharmaceuticals. You can skip that stuff if you’re not interested, and focus on the bulk of the book which is the practical components of improving daily mood.
All in all, would definitely recommend to anyone who’s looking for some self-improvement! Doesn’t matter who - we all could benefit.
In my opinion, everyone and anyone could benefit from understanding the principles of CBT. Every human on this planet has unfairly talked down to themselves, experienced a pattern of distorted thinking, procrastinated on something they shouldn’t have, had a bad day they blew out of proportion, etc. I wasn’t particularly looking for strategies for myself when I picked up this book, but I actually find myself using its ideas on a regular basis. Even though my life right now isn’t too stressful or anything, I still can benefit from dismantling illogical thoughts. And my days are a little smoother for it.
It’s not a particularly flashy or fancy book (plus it’s hella long), but it’s one that’s grounded in solid practical strategies for reshaping your automatic negative thoughts. Unlike its sexier self-help counterparts, it’s very practical and simple. However, it’s not a book that you can just read through in one gulp - you need to actually think about times where you’ve made certain mistakes, and illogical patterns of thinking. If you don’t take the time to reflect and be honest with yourself, you’ll gain nothing from CBT and dismiss is it as common sense.
To me, it’s like reading a book on how to ride a bicycle versus actually trying out a bicycle.
You need to take the time to match the theory with action. Or it just won’t help.
At the end, the author goes through more of the medicine around mood stabilization and some (fairly outdated) data on pharmaceuticals. You can skip that stuff if you’re not interested, and focus on the bulk of the book which is the practical components of improving daily mood.
All in all, would definitely recommend to anyone who’s looking for some self-improvement! Doesn’t matter who - we all could benefit.