Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata

241 reviews

reflective fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Complicated
Loveable characters: Complicated
Diverse cast of characters: No
Flaws of characters a main focus: Yes

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funny lighthearted fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: No
Loveable characters: No
Diverse cast of characters: No
Flaws of characters a main focus: No

This book is quirky and charming. I respect that Keiko just has no ability to be normalTM (whatever that even means) and her dedication to her routine and the one thing she likes. But god, Shiraha is insufferable and sometimes reading his bullshit commentary was so grating. And everyone pressuring and bullying Keiko was grating. It seems like that was part of the point, but at times it was difficult to read.

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challenging emotional inspiring reflective medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Complicated
Loveable characters: Complicated
Diverse cast of characters: No
Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

I was recommended this book by Abigail Melton Munday on the Autistics Worldwide Facebook Group. This is not a person I know, but as the group is public I feel OK naming them.
Seemed like a good idea to read a few titles in aid of Autism month.

The first thing that struck me about this book was how the sales pitch on the cover was completely wrong. As an Autistic reader, perhaps I have a different take on it, but I don't think it's witty or hilarious. I'd go with interesting and perhaps thought provoking.  It's definitely much more funny (oh.), rather than funny (ha ha!).

My Japanese is quite sketchy, but as someone who ran the anime club for about a decade I was fairly culturally literate. This is a story set in Japan, and some of its "oddness" is Japanese, and some is neurological. It wasn't until the end of the book that I heard the original title was コンビニ人間 (Kombini Ningen - or convenience-store person). Looking up the Kanji for the protagonist's name, I was amused to find that it could indeed be considered a pun as, I have been told, is common in Japanese literature. Alternate readings of the name "Furukura" do have different meanings and though it could be commonly read as Old "River", it could also be read as "Hideaway", "hiding place" or "storehouse". This is an apt name for a girl who learns early in life that if she acts intuitively, her ways of doing things will get her into in big trouble. She instead becomes someone who masks herself behind walls of affectations and habits learned by copying the "normal" people around her.

This characterisation was interesting to me in a couple of ways. The first is that this girl is depicted as feeling justified for violence. In my experience, denying regret for childhood violence used when you are in the middle of a panic or urgent situation, is less about being remorseless and more about protecting yourself from being criticised. Engaging with negative self-critique can be really difficult when you don't even understand your own motivations. She clearly has some failure to understand the emotions of others, but her disdain for others at times borders on not just Autistic, but callous. Some writeups online suggest that the character might be sociopathic, but her rigid attention to rules and guidelines and her disinterest in lying or manipulation has me convinced that she's Autistic. I do find it a little problematic that this Autistic child is depicted as creepy and dangerous.. but at the same time, it's realistic to demonstrate the fact that when people don't understand you they may want to keep away from you.

The thematics of this book seem quite tongue in cheek. It's a commentary of the cultural ideas that we take for granted. You are an inhuman weirdo if you dedicate yourself to something you are an expert at, passionate about, but that also confers low social status. You are expected to selflessly find a man to dedicate yourself to the service of, maintaining your looks, cooking and cleaning, and bringing comfort with a calm and positive demeanour for the benefit of your household.
But, that's basically the same thing.. only with one of them you are required to also be a bedslave, and if, like this character, you are asexual, then you also come up against the influences of those who tell you that you are not good enough, and that you need to have a baby to be a valid contributing woman within a society.

Keiko feels pressured into finding a human male to affect a relationship with so as to keep the people around her happy with her. As she becomes more and more aware of the masks she feels she has to wear just to have human contact, she realises how false her friendships with others are, and how unwilling they are to accept her. The talk of Curing her difference hit me like an emotional fist. It's been so many years since I faced a person in my sphere who thought I was unworthy because I was strange, and it brought some of that memory back.  

Some of the most moving parts in this story for me were Keiko's sense impressions of the Kombini. I know exactly what it is like to sense your environment through its sounds, and the clues and patterns that hint what your next interaction will be. I feel with my house. I am in tune with its rhythms and sounds in much the same way. I know when pets need feeding, and when the traffic will be loud, or quiet. The act of getting off public transport a block before your stop I immediately understood as a chance to figure out what the mood of the day was; is it likely to rain?, is a special event on?, are there roadworks?, will people feel energetic, or low?.. all these would affect the systems in the shop, and the hypervigilance that she channels into managing those systems felt SO familiar to me. Recognising patterns like how a person's body language or sounds can tell you what method of payment they might use, cash or card. Yep, this is how I interact with my world.

I think this book packs quite a bit in for a short read. 

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dark emotional sad fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Complicated
Loveable characters: No
Diverse cast of characters: N/A
Flaws of characters a main focus: Yes

Gak tau mau jelasin tentang buku ini kayak gimana. Tapi, yang jelas buku ini tuh tipis tapi bisa banget nyenggol segala arah. Sedihnya ada, anehnya ada, kasihannya ada, creepynya ada banget, marah dan keselnya apalagi, numpuk maksimal.

Selama baca buku ini, aku teringat sama salah satu video yang pernah aku tonton. Sebuah video yang menggambarkan isi pikir seseorang dengan skizofrenia, dan buku ini ngasih sensasi yang sama ketika aku nonton video itu. Buku ini serasa membawa kita masuk ke dalam isi kepalanya, bagaimana dia melihat dunia sekitar dia dan bagaimana pola pikirnya berbeda dengan orang-orang kebanyakan.

Tapi, di sisi lain, persoalan yang menekan dia rasanya terlalu nyata, terlalu real, seperti kenapa usia kepala tiga pekerjaannya belum tetap, atau kenapa belum menikah, atau kenapa ini dan kenapa itu. Rasanya, I can relate to the situation, yang mana tekanan-tekanan ini memang ada, sejak dulu sampai sekarang di kehidupan sosial.

Sebetulnya, Furukura gak ganggu sama sekali walaupun pola pikirnya jelas berbeda, justru lingkungan sosialnya yang terkesan terlalu ikut campur dengan urusannya dia.

Tapi, ada satu yang bikin aku benar-benar kesal. Marah banget. Sosok Shiraha benar-benar parasit, bikin emosi. Pokoknya kesel banget. Harusnya dia udah jadi fossil. POKONYA SHIRAHA ANEEEEEEEH.

Buku ini sendiri pacenya cepet, mengingatkan aku waktu baca Cursed Bunny yang sukses bikin aku penasaran terus-terusan. 

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challenging reflective fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Complicated
Loveable characters: Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

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emotional funny hopeful informative reflective sad medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven: A mix
Strong character development: Yes
Loveable characters: Yes
Diverse cast of characters: N/A
Flaws of characters a main focus: No

A funny, smart, and charming little novel that shows us the world through an "odd" protagonist. I think the protagonist is neurodivergent but the point of the story isn't so much about in what way(s) she's neurodivergent or what diagnosis might she get. It's more so an entry point to reflect back to us just how harsh society often is about conforming to norms: people around her care much more that she's "normal" rather than happy. This can be really depressing! At times, the story is so sad and a little alarming, but the overall takeaway is optimistic, surprisingly. 

There is one character who loves to hear himself talk and has an awful sexist attitude and is really just not likeable but he serves a useful function in the story of making plain the unspoken beliefs of society, some that many people probably think they're too enlightened to believe but probably hold way deep down, due to internalized ableism. And he's also useful to show the consequences of the thought experiment: if our protagonist did conform, would it make her happy? It further shows (and the annoying character even says himself) how dysfunctional our society actually is, that people need to contort themselves into very narrow versions of themselves (or really, not themselves at all) to survive in late stage capitalism.

The peek into the Japanese convenience store culture is also fascinating!

Listened to the audiobook, which I highly recommend. The narrator does a great job with the voices and lending personality to the different characters through voice acting. And a very short listen!

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emotional hopeful reflective sad fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Yes

Expand filter menu Content Warnings
challenging lighthearted reflective slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Complicated
Loveable characters: Complicated
Diverse cast of characters: Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

A deceptively lighthearted story that will leave you thinking for days :) 

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funny reflective fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Complicated
Loveable characters: Complicated
Diverse cast of characters: No
Flaws of characters a main focus: Yes

keiko is real asf idc. she would LOVE vecnas monologue on society or capitalism or whatever. 

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