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3.56 AVERAGE
3.56 AVERAGE
I was really frustrated with this book all the way until the appendix.
challenging
informative
reflective
I think this book blew my mind a little bit. It's of course to be taken with a grain of salt, and considered in the context of the time it was published, but I think a lot of it still holds up. The research was presented in an accessible and interesting way, and I appreciated the use of books/movies to assess conversation. I think I'm just really into linguistics and the ideas that language can tell us so much about cultural patterns. This was a great book to delve into that, especially with something as discussed/contentious as men and women's communication.
challenging
informative
reflective
medium-paced
informative
reflective
slow-paced
informative
reflective
medium-paced
herterosexist and closed minded. If you can look past that I guess there's some interesting points, but so hard to look past.
Tannen's work is often cited as foundational to notions of gender and language, but it's hard to see that 27 years after its publication. This book subtly uses language that favors or excuses male behavior and calls on women to be more assertive, even while admitting that women who do are less likely to be respected by men.
Another thing that bothered me was the way Tannen conflated gender with personality. Some people are more taciturn than others, but gender is not the indicator, per se.
Another thing that bothered me was the way Tannen conflated gender with personality. Some people are more taciturn than others, but gender is not the indicator, per se.
informative
slow-paced
I have had this book on my shelf for sometime and have been meaning to read to help improve my dialogue in writing. Ironically I thought it would be fun to read while I was in a budding relationship and couldn’t understand the guy. Overall the book is fine and said what I thought. I got 100 pages in and it felt repetitive. Given this was written in the 90s, I opted to skim around and it seemed the general message was same and there was only a paragraph at end that touched on cultural and how gender identity could change this. Expected again for the 90s. So overall, a bit to predicable for me in terms of research and content. But ultimately felt very narrow in view.
informative
medium-paced
Like most non fiction books I’ve read I think there was a lot of helpful info but I think at times it was very repetitive, especially near the end which made it difficult to stay engaged. I did feel that a lot of the things discussed were things I had already noticed during my life so I’m glad to see my thinking is now science backed. Though I do think that in terms of comprising in conversation it is the men that need to expand their horizons a bit more than women.
"Nonviolent Communication" is the book I recommend most, and this ties in with it beautifully, but focusing on differences in the communication styles between men and women. It's fascinating to learn about how humans work, such as how women's communication style changes as soon as there are any men in the room, but men use one communication style whether or not women are present. It's also interesting to see the large communication style differences between the sexes from toddlerhood on.
This book was helpful to me almost immediately. A female friend reached out to me to express a fear, and I strove to reassure her by logically explaining why her fear was unrealistic. The book contains a very similar example, and when I remembered it I realized it probably sounded like I was invalidating her fear and telling her that she was foolish to think that way. I tried to make up for my error, to empathize and show that I understood why it was scary.
That's just one example. Much of this book is just "hm, that's interesting" but there's a great deal that's practical and can be used immediately in conversation, or will just change how you approach some interpersonal situations differently. Highly recommended. This is the sort of material I would love to see students taught and trained in before they ever graduate high school.
This book was helpful to me almost immediately. A female friend reached out to me to express a fear, and I strove to reassure her by logically explaining why her fear was unrealistic. The book contains a very similar example, and when I remembered it I realized it probably sounded like I was invalidating her fear and telling her that she was foolish to think that way. I tried to make up for my error, to empathize and show that I understood why it was scary.
That's just one example. Much of this book is just "hm, that's interesting" but there's a great deal that's practical and can be used immediately in conversation, or will just change how you approach some interpersonal situations differently. Highly recommended. This is the sort of material I would love to see students taught and trained in before they ever graduate high school.