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3.99 AVERAGE
3.99 AVERAGE
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
Excellent book with great advice for relationships. Although I myself and heterosexual, I would have appreciated a more neutral and inclusive verbiage to the relationship depictions in the book. I think the concepts in this book are truly relatable to all relationships, not just romantic ones or marriage. Definitely a must read.
Ignoring the heteronormative connotations and ever present bible/jesus references that are present throughout the whole book (it was published in 1990 originally, I'll cut old mate some slack), I started this book thinking it wasn't so bad.
It was quick and easy to read, and there were a few kernels of knowledge that I actually thought were useful (don't be mislead though, I reckon a good 90% of this "new-found-knowledge" is common sense if you're in a healthy relationship in the 21st century). But not only that, Chapman apparently managed to fix every relationship he discussed in the book. Great, right?! Surely I'll learn some tips and tricks to show my partner a little extra loving.
Wrong. It almost had me. I've already been a little annoyed the whole book at the books lack of diversity and discriminatory language (helloooooo LGBTQI and polyamorous relationships EXIST). Then I started reading the chapter "Loving the Unlovely". Get fucked. No thanks. All this chapter does is promote misogyny and abusive relationships. Love may not always be easy, but it should not "challenge" you, as Chapman refers to being **abused**. You're allowed to have limits, you're allowed to leave. All parties should be able to or willing to make compromises, should be putting in effort. If you don't see the problem with this chapter, then I question your ability to have/understand a healthy relationship where all parties are respected and valued.
I finished the book and worked out my love language is "Quality Time" which actually gave me some insight into what I desire in my relationships, which is the only reason I give this book 2 stars. But its promotion of abusive relationships, the fact that this book is truly only for hetero-white-christian-monogamous couples and its clear misogyny has me done. Do not suggest. You can probably find this information somewhere else, written better.
*Will potentially update with suggestions for similar and better books, if I ever decide to read more regarding this topic*
Let me know if you know of any better reads around this topic?
It was quick and easy to read, and there were a few kernels of knowledge that I actually thought were useful (don't be mislead though, I reckon a good 90% of this "new-found-knowledge" is common sense if you're in a healthy relationship in the 21st century). But not only that, Chapman apparently managed to fix every relationship he discussed in the book. Great, right?! Surely I'll learn some tips and tricks to show my partner a little extra loving.
Wrong. It almost had me. I've already been a little annoyed the whole book at the books lack of diversity and discriminatory language (helloooooo LGBTQI and polyamorous relationships EXIST). Then I started reading the chapter "Loving the Unlovely". Get fucked. No thanks. All this chapter does is promote misogyny and abusive relationships. Love may not always be easy, but it should not "challenge" you, as Chapman refers to being **abused**. You're allowed to have limits, you're allowed to leave. All parties should be able to or willing to make compromises, should be putting in effort. If you don't see the problem with this chapter, then I question your ability to have/understand a healthy relationship where all parties are respected and valued.
I finished the book and worked out my love language is "Quality Time" which actually gave me some insight into what I desire in my relationships, which is the only reason I give this book 2 stars. But its promotion of abusive relationships, the fact that this book is truly only for hetero-white-christian-monogamous couples and its clear misogyny has me done. Do not suggest. You can probably find this information somewhere else, written better.
*Will potentially update with suggestions for similar and better books, if I ever decide to read more regarding this topic*
Let me know if you know of any better reads around this topic?
informative
inspiring
reflective
It was ok. Little bit too wholesome for me but I liked the premise a lot. helped me understand my husband.
I felt this book was meant more for someone who is struggling in their own relationship/marriage than for someone in an already happy and healthy marriage. A lot the info seemed more like common sense to me but I can definitely see how couples who don’t communicate very well would benefit from this book. It still had some interesting tidbits! I really liked the last chapter on kids and how to determine their primary love language. Will definitely keep that in mind as my toddler gets older and starts showing signs of what hers is.
The book has a lot of good advice for relationships. I'd recommend this if you definitely need an advice. Though, some parts are very biblical on sense (which may look skeptical to some), however, the point was still given justice.
informative
reflective
fast-paced
Pretty insightful. I enjoyed the concept of the 5 love languages. At the same time learning what's mine and have a better understanding of each component. I also do find it helpful and important to speak or express love for others in their language. Personally, this could not only apply to spouses/partners, but to any people around us.
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
slow-paced