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bootman's review
1.0
I rate 99.9% of the books I read 5 stars because I understand books are subjective and a topic or writings tyle that doesn’t interest me may interest others. When I don’t give a book 5 stars, I give it 3 or 4 instead. This book, I gave 1 star. Why? Because I think it’s dangerous, and I cannot believe how many people follow the work of these men religiously.
When I say dangerous, this isn’t hyperbole. I found this book because I was trying to learn more about what the hell is wrong with young men in light of all of the mass shootings. Someone said Warren Farrell is really popular for his work with young men, so I checked this out. Not only is this book filled with an insane amount of misinformation and pseudoscience, but this book furthers the idea that men have it terrible because of women.
Don’t get me wrong, young men are struggling, and they need help. The issue with the book is that it’s regularly putting the blame on women, and then it also lies about statistics that are extremely easy to fact check. It’s almost as though Farrell knows he’s full of shit because he mentions statistics when they’re false but dives into them deeper when they’re accurate or referencing a good study.
My main issue with this book is that with the fact that most mass shooters are incels, this book will most likely just radicalize them more. What’s crazy is that I usually get pissed about pseudoscience in these books, but that’s the least of the issues with it. But, when it does get into “healing” towards the end with John Gray, it says homeopathy is a legitimate science and goes as far to make claims that natural remedies can cure autism (not help, but cure autism).
Check this book out if you want or if you don’t believe me. But for the love of God, don’t use it as a book to help create better young men because it’s filled with misinformation. I’d love to think it’s ignorance, but these are two smart guys, so it really feels like they do this intentionally.
If you’re interested, I wrote a piece about some of the misinformation from the book early on when I noticed how often it was happening: https://therewiredsoul.substack.com/p/the-lies-male-oppression-are-making
When I say dangerous, this isn’t hyperbole. I found this book because I was trying to learn more about what the hell is wrong with young men in light of all of the mass shootings. Someone said Warren Farrell is really popular for his work with young men, so I checked this out. Not only is this book filled with an insane amount of misinformation and pseudoscience, but this book furthers the idea that men have it terrible because of women.
Don’t get me wrong, young men are struggling, and they need help. The issue with the book is that it’s regularly putting the blame on women, and then it also lies about statistics that are extremely easy to fact check. It’s almost as though Farrell knows he’s full of shit because he mentions statistics when they’re false but dives into them deeper when they’re accurate or referencing a good study.
My main issue with this book is that with the fact that most mass shooters are incels, this book will most likely just radicalize them more. What’s crazy is that I usually get pissed about pseudoscience in these books, but that’s the least of the issues with it. But, when it does get into “healing” towards the end with John Gray, it says homeopathy is a legitimate science and goes as far to make claims that natural remedies can cure autism (not help, but cure autism).
Check this book out if you want or if you don’t believe me. But for the love of God, don’t use it as a book to help create better young men because it’s filled with misinformation. I’d love to think it’s ignorance, but these are two smart guys, so it really feels like they do this intentionally.
If you’re interested, I wrote a piece about some of the misinformation from the book early on when I noticed how often it was happening: https://therewiredsoul.substack.com/p/the-lies-male-oppression-are-making
mpdarby's review
4.0
Great Info about how to raise emotionally mature boys. But then the book went off the deep end with pseudoscience ADHD "cures."
kyrsten042's review
I hear what it's saying, but holy Hana. Is there a way to explain this without thoroughly commoditizing women? Self-proclaimed feminist authors who can't escape objectifying language to save their lives.
trebor's review
2.0
Warren continues his work on trying to understand the male condition and to his credit, he consistently keeps it in a feminist-friendly frame with an eye to extending gender liberation to men. If you have read any of his previous works (As I had with The Myth of Male Power) you will recognize many of the examples and arguments are given but this book comes at them from the frame of parenthood and helping younger men and boys.
He provides good evidenced examples of the differing rates of suicide and disease. Unfortunately, the analysis offered is often somewhat surface level and is punctuated throughout by pseudoscience about plastics byproducts and estrogen, primal wounds (with adoption) and the worst is a ramble around ADHD which while I agree Psychiatry has often fallen short of the Mental Health models we need promoting natural supplements as a treatment is just baffling.
If you are interested in Warrens's work I would much more suggest you read The Myth of Male Power as even though it has its problems its a much more well-rounded book. If you are looking for something from the frame of hetereonormative parenthood and want some practical advice it does offer that but it must be read with a critical eye.
He provides good evidenced examples of the differing rates of suicide and disease. Unfortunately, the analysis offered is often somewhat surface level and is punctuated throughout by pseudoscience about plastics byproducts and estrogen, primal wounds (with adoption) and the worst is a ramble around ADHD which while I agree Psychiatry has often fallen short of the Mental Health models we need promoting natural supplements as a treatment is just baffling.
If you are interested in Warrens's work I would much more suggest you read The Myth of Male Power as even though it has its problems its a much more well-rounded book. If you are looking for something from the frame of hetereonormative parenthood and want some practical advice it does offer that but it must be read with a critical eye.
courtneyward's review against another edition
It was such a promising premise. Unfortunately the authors avoid all legitimate data that might refute their claims until they eventually veer off into complete pseudoscience. I had to stop when it the authors went from questionable opinions to downright harmful.
scott_e_k's review
5.0
Amazing look at how completely the issues of boys and men are ignored (and in a lot of ways vilified) in society. Brilliant and understanding look at the plight of boys and men with viable ideas on how to truly remedy the issues causing that plight. This book should be a must read for all but should be required reading for anyone in an educational career.
smsloyer's review
2.0
2.0/5.0 stars
This book was bad and I'll give two reasons for it.
Reason #1 - Structure and Content: The structure of this book seems haphazard and to me it reads as poorly organized. Additionally, the author uses anecdote more than actual points of data and seems unwilling to confront the consequences of tough racial and socio-economic truths that affect boys and their development into men. He recognizes these disparities but his prescriptions do not take them into account.
Reason #2 - Solutions: I think he redeems himself slightly a star here. Nevertheless, while he correctly identifies many issues that plague boys, I believe he is too engulfed in a modern liberal ideology to provide functional solutions. He is correct in saying that a father's time with boys is worth more than a father's money with boys. Nevertheless, his solution is to make more stay-at-home dads. In this argument, he seems to fail to grasp how the majority of men have purpose. It's clear that the use of anecdote and personal story is a major hindrannce to how he sees solutions to the "Boy Crisis."
I really wish this book was better written. Maybe another author can do a better job content-wise and solution wise.
This book was bad and I'll give two reasons for it.
Reason #1 - Structure and Content: The structure of this book seems haphazard and to me it reads as poorly organized. Additionally, the author uses anecdote more than actual points of data and seems unwilling to confront the consequences of tough racial and socio-economic truths that affect boys and their development into men. He recognizes these disparities but his prescriptions do not take them into account.
Reason #2 - Solutions: I think he redeems himself slightly a star here. Nevertheless, while he correctly identifies many issues that plague boys, I believe he is too engulfed in a modern liberal ideology to provide functional solutions. He is correct in saying that a father's time with boys is worth more than a father's money with boys. Nevertheless, his solution is to make more stay-at-home dads. In this argument, he seems to fail to grasp how the majority of men have purpose. It's clear that the use of anecdote and personal story is a major hindrannce to how he sees solutions to the "Boy Crisis."
I really wish this book was better written. Maybe another author can do a better job content-wise and solution wise.