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658 reviews for:
The State Of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - a book for anyone who has ever loved
Esther Perel
4.26 AVERAGE
658 reviews for:
The State Of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - a book for anyone who has ever loved
Esther Perel
4.26 AVERAGE
this book is really good in making you understand the infidelity question, and it for sure does a better job than articles, tweets or reddit posts one can find online.
i’d recommend everyone who is going through an affair (on whichever side you are on) to read this book, but also if you’re in general interested in a subject of couples psychology, it can be a very fascinating read
i’d recommend everyone who is going through an affair (on whichever side you are on) to read this book, but also if you’re in general interested in a subject of couples psychology, it can be a very fascinating read
Quite a good book. I liked how she conceptualizes relationships. There's the I and the We. To help the marriage/relationship, one must address both.
Some of the book seems like common sense, but I liked seeing how she fits logical action into a practice that deals with the illogical.
Some of the book seems like common sense, but I liked seeing how she fits logical action into a practice that deals with the illogical.
Very different way to discuss affairs with clients. Helpful and insightful.
Yikes. I don't agree with 100% of Perel's statements in this book, but true to form, she drops some undeniable #truthbombs that are startling in their clarity. Highly recommend the audio, read by the author.
Perel challenged my longstanding, rather binary perception of infidelity and forged it into a complex topic of human experience with illustrating examples.
So comforted by the fact that this book exists. Before reading it I could feel the need for this insight and disclosure about such a taboo topic. This book is shadow work. It transcends demonizing adultery, which I believe we are more than ready for the in the modern world. My only criticism is how the majority of the book is hetero-normative. Towards the end there is more talk of relationships that are queer and non conventional. I believe those populations to be more evolved in the topic of non-monogamy, which is at the threshold of healing and transcending infidelity. At the same time this book does not at all demonize monogamy, which is important since true healing is inclusive. There is no talk of folks who are trans or intersex in this book, and how their unique experiences within relationships and sexuality contribute to this issue, which I believe would enrich the conversation 10 fold. Overall, a great piece to debate. I think everyone interested in long-term partnership should give this a read, even if you aren’t married and even if you haven’t personally come across infidelity. This book helps to evolve our relational language and outlook.
One of the best non-fiction books I read this year. It covered the sensitive topic of affairs so well. Some books of this kind lean too much on the patient interviews/ stories leaving little to no commentary, or it goes the other way where the author makes many assertions that have no real examples. In something as touchy as this it was really nice to have such a good balance. It is also clear that Perel has been doing this for a very long time, she seems to have empathy for both the spouse in the affair and the one outside of it. For something that a huge percentage of people do, there aren't really many non fiction books that take on the topic. I really didn’t want this book to end.
I found it interesting at first but lost interest quickly, however I think if you have ever been affected by an affair it would be a great read! I couldn’t relate and lost interest.
challenging
hopeful
informative
reflective
slow-paced
This book was incredibly interesting and gave many real life examples. Of course, we all hope not to have to experience infidelity but we're all touched by it one way or another.