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ninnguyen's review against another edition
3.0
it was good I think. gave me some ideas n recommended lots of books
but it was more about the myths and perks of being alone, rather than how to be alone (had some good tips tho)
but it was more about the myths and perks of being alone, rather than how to be alone (had some good tips tho)
ms_smith's review against another edition
informative
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
4.0
Pont jókor jött szembe velem ez a könyv, mert nemrégiben fedeztem fel én is az egyedüllét örömeit és kezdtem el mélyebben gondolkodni a témáról. Gyerekkoromban állandóan azt hallottam, hogy egyedül lenni rossz dolog és jobb az, ha társaságban vagyunk. Rengeteg toxikus kapcsolat és "barátság" árán aztán végre rájöttem, hogy ez mekkora egy bullsh*t. Természetesen és magától értetődően nem tartoznak ide azok az esetek, ahol valakinek szüksége van mások segítségére az életviteléhez, bár szerintem ott is fel lehet állítani egy működő rendszert. 25 éves koromra ráébredtem, hogy jobban szeretek egyedül lenni és csak olyanokra szánni az időmet akik tényleg megérik a fáradtságot, és kölcsönös energiát fektetnek egy kapcsolatba, ezzel egyetemben pedig többre kezdtem értékelni a csendes, közös olvasós vagy valamilyen kreatívkodós/kikapcsolódós programot akár a párommal, akár egyedül. Szüleimtől ezért nem is egyszer kaptam már meg, hogy ez a viselkedés nem normális, és szerintem ez azért van mert manapság az emberek egyáltalán nem toleránsak a másikkal szemben. Nincs meg az alapvető tisztelet a másik iránt; az emberek nem akarják észrevenni, hogy nem csak egy járható út van, nem minden fekete vagy fehér; mindent muszáj felcímkézniük (fekete, fehér, nő, férfi, meleg, hetero, stb.); de hiszen ez nem is csoda, mikor az internet egyfajta burkot von az ember köré, bedobozol bennünket, úgy hogy csak a saját véleményünk visszhangját halljuk és ez nem feltétlenül jó. Ez az én legnagyobb bajom a világgal, és ezért gondolom úgy, hogy az internet ezen hatalmas negatívuma sokszor visszavet(het)i a pozitívumokat. Szerintem ez a könyv egyik oldalra sem áll, egyszerűen csak betekintést szeretne nyújtani abba, hogy miért lehet valaki számára élvezetes és hasznos, ha egyedül él/végez különböző dolgokat. Ez persze nem egyenlő azzal, hogy akkor nem is szeret másokkal szóba elegyedni vagy társaságban lenni, viszont az emberek így értelmez(het)ik pont a már fent említett ok miatt; szeretnek polarizálni. Pont ezért a "Tiszteljük a különbségeket!" c. fejezet volt rám a legnagyobb hatással, és gondolkodtatott el mélyebben a témát illetően. Azt is külön pozitívumként szeretném említeni, hogy az írónő egy ajánlott irodalom részt is mellékelt, ahol több olyan művet is említ, amelyek még inkább elmélyíthetik a kedves olvasót a témában, szóval nem teljesen értem azokat, akik szerint semmit nem adott a könyv. Természetesen vannak hiányosságai (kinek, minek nincsenek?) is - a "Szabadság" c. részt például picit relatívnak éreztem - engem viszont ez annyira nem zavart, mivel egy a témába bevezető könyvként gondolok erre az olvasmányra, és szerintem ez is volt az eredeti célja (mint a legtöbb The School of Life könyvnek).
shervinbr's review against another edition
3.0
كتابى متفاوت با هم صنفى هايش :)
ابتدا توضيحى در باب تاريخچه " نكوهش تنهايى " ميده و سپس مطالبى در ارتباط با لذت بردن بيشتر از تنهايى.
نكته منفى كتاب اينكه مانند بقيه كتاب هاى هم رده ، دچار تكرار و زياده گويى ميشه و نكته مثبت اينكه نويسنده از بريده هاى كتاب ها و مقالات نسبتا زيادى استفاده ميكنه كه باعث ميشه مطالب گفته شده فقط از زبان نويسنده نباشه و خواننده رو با ابعاد مختلف ماجرا اشنا كنه.
شايد اگر با تنهايى بيشتر مشكل داشتم اين كتاب كمك زيادترى بهم ميكرد اما قطعا چيزهايى ازش ياد گرفتم كه در مواردى خاص ازشون استفاده خواهم كرد
ابتدا توضيحى در باب تاريخچه " نكوهش تنهايى " ميده و سپس مطالبى در ارتباط با لذت بردن بيشتر از تنهايى.
نكته منفى كتاب اينكه مانند بقيه كتاب هاى هم رده ، دچار تكرار و زياده گويى ميشه و نكته مثبت اينكه نويسنده از بريده هاى كتاب ها و مقالات نسبتا زيادى استفاده ميكنه كه باعث ميشه مطالب گفته شده فقط از زبان نويسنده نباشه و خواننده رو با ابعاد مختلف ماجرا اشنا كنه.
شايد اگر با تنهايى بيشتر مشكل داشتم اين كتاب كمك زيادترى بهم ميكرد اما قطعا چيزهايى ازش ياد گرفتم كه در مواردى خاص ازشون استفاده خواهم كرد
uditnair24's review against another edition
4.0
I am somebody who completely embraces the solitude and I often find peace with it. And as a result this book naturally attracted me. In the first part of the book author goes on to describe about the personal experiences with solitude over the years. Then she goes on to narrate the cultural and historical instances of solitude vis a vis the community driven life spaces. The first part of the book presents solitude as something which is not much appreciated by the society. As the author says all people who embrace solitude are termed either mad or sad or bad. This can get extended to psychos or sociopaths or extreme nerd and what not.
The author points out that solitude is often seen as countercultural in current settings. And she finds this amusing because we live at a time when personal freedom and liberty is valued much more than before.
Towards the end of the book she points out some of the joys of solitude. First of all being able to realise the self. In the times of hurry and rat race it's important to self introspect and solitude provides that luxury. The second and perhaps the most important joy is the attunement to nature. To witness the majesty of nature one must embrace solitude and this cannot be denied at all. The third joy according to author is the ability to connect to divine.
As a whole it's a wonderful read. Although one might feel that author wants everybody to embrace solitude and here is the part where its gets trickier. I mean the whole premise of the book started with stating that embracing solitude is countercultural but then repeated attempts to persuade people is not necessary really. I mean it's fine if people pick community living over solitude. I guess every option should be respected as far as it is free choice.
The author points out that solitude is often seen as countercultural in current settings. And she finds this amusing because we live at a time when personal freedom and liberty is valued much more than before.
Towards the end of the book she points out some of the joys of solitude. First of all being able to realise the self. In the times of hurry and rat race it's important to self introspect and solitude provides that luxury. The second and perhaps the most important joy is the attunement to nature. To witness the majesty of nature one must embrace solitude and this cannot be denied at all. The third joy according to author is the ability to connect to divine.
As a whole it's a wonderful read. Although one might feel that author wants everybody to embrace solitude and here is the part where its gets trickier. I mean the whole premise of the book started with stating that embracing solitude is countercultural but then repeated attempts to persuade people is not necessary really. I mean it's fine if people pick community living over solitude. I guess every option should be respected as far as it is free choice.
pattydsf's review against another edition
3.0
"Think about it for a moment. It is truly very odd.
…We live in a society which sees high self-esteem as a proof of well-being, but we do not want to be intimate with this admirable and desirable person.
We see moral and social conventions as inhibitions on our personal freedoms, and yet we are frightened of anyone who goes away from the crowd and develops ‘eccentric’ habits.
…We think we are unique, special and deserving of happiness, but we are terrified of being alone.” p. 20
I don’t have much trouble being alone. I have more trouble with wanting to be alone (shades of Garbo) when others want me to be with them. So much of this small book is not aimed at me.
However, I had two reasons for reading this. First of all, I really like Maitland’s writings. She was one of the first authors that I read that showed me that Christianity and feminism might be able to be integral to my life. I still revisit the essays that she edited on Christian feminism decades ago.
Also I wanted to read one of Picador’s School of Life. Maybe it isn’t fair to start with an author I like, but I was curious about how these books worked. If Maitland’s is a good example, they are short reads about interesting topics that may lead you to other books on the subject. Sometimes all you need is a short intro to a subject you know nothing about.
I can’t say that I learned anything new about being alone. Many of Maitland’s suggestions are things I already do. For example, she suggests that the reader find ways to be solitary. I am a handweaver. This is not a hobby that you do with lots of other people. I spend time with other weavers, but not when I am actually at my loom.
Since I have been reading about solitude and silence, I am grateful to Maitland for suggesting some books to add to my reading list. I have plenty to read, but this subject seems to be a project of mine. There are five to six books already on my TBR pile about either silence or solitude.
If you are curious about why someone would choose to be alone – pick this up. If you have read Maitland’s book about silence and want to know why she needed to write about both silence and aloneness, you should find this.
…We live in a society which sees high self-esteem as a proof of well-being, but we do not want to be intimate with this admirable and desirable person.
We see moral and social conventions as inhibitions on our personal freedoms, and yet we are frightened of anyone who goes away from the crowd and develops ‘eccentric’ habits.
…We think we are unique, special and deserving of happiness, but we are terrified of being alone.” p. 20
I don’t have much trouble being alone. I have more trouble with wanting to be alone (shades of Garbo) when others want me to be with them. So much of this small book is not aimed at me.
However, I had two reasons for reading this. First of all, I really like Maitland’s writings. She was one of the first authors that I read that showed me that Christianity and feminism might be able to be integral to my life. I still revisit the essays that she edited on Christian feminism decades ago.
Also I wanted to read one of Picador’s School of Life. Maybe it isn’t fair to start with an author I like, but I was curious about how these books worked. If Maitland’s is a good example, they are short reads about interesting topics that may lead you to other books on the subject. Sometimes all you need is a short intro to a subject you know nothing about.
I can’t say that I learned anything new about being alone. Many of Maitland’s suggestions are things I already do. For example, she suggests that the reader find ways to be solitary. I am a handweaver. This is not a hobby that you do with lots of other people. I spend time with other weavers, but not when I am actually at my loom.
Since I have been reading about solitude and silence, I am grateful to Maitland for suggesting some books to add to my reading list. I have plenty to read, but this subject seems to be a project of mine. There are five to six books already on my TBR pile about either silence or solitude.
If you are curious about why someone would choose to be alone – pick this up. If you have read Maitland’s book about silence and want to know why she needed to write about both silence and aloneness, you should find this.
trippalli's review
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
relaxing
slow-paced
4.75
Excellent reflection of the joys of being alone; the variety of experiences we do alone and ways to try new experiences alone.. Many philosophical reflections, historical examples and inspirations. Excellent.