Take a photo of a barcode or cover
257 reviews for:
The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
Kelly McGonigal
4.1 AVERAGE
257 reviews for:
The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
Kelly McGonigal
4.1 AVERAGE
I will read this again at some point after trying some of the suggestions. Overall this was a helpful book.
My big "aha" that I wrote down was that one primary equation for willpower is Self-Acceptance + Self-Awareness + Remembering What's Important. While this isn't shocking or new, it is another way of wording how I approach life, so I appreciate the reframe.
My big "aha" that I wrote down was that one primary equation for willpower is Self-Acceptance + Self-Awareness + Remembering What's Important. While this isn't shocking or new, it is another way of wording how I approach life, so I appreciate the reframe.
An easy to read, but very thought-provoking book. What the author is ultimately bringing to the table is, "What are your goals? What are your temptations? What are your excuses?" For anything thinking the book is a magical "willpower pill" - forget it. The book outlines how willpower is a potential that we as humans possess - but exercising it requires mentally and emotionally pushing yourself in that direction. Willpower can help us create new, positive habits. Lack of willpower can often keep us in vicious, self-defeating cycles of overeating, gambling, sex addition, internet addiction, etc. I'm going to read this book again in the near future, and take notes as I go to better understand the book as a kind of "syllabus" for a personal willpower-building program.
Interesting and fairly pragmatic. The implementation suggestions were a bit briefer and less systematic than could be hoped for. Overall, this book is definitely worth a read-through.
informative
slow-paced
An excellent breakdown of the science of self-control. Not only will you better understand how it work (or doesn't work), I think the techniques in this book could actually work. One of the key thoughts is to observe yourself rather than running on autopilot. Observe your own feelings, urges and then watch for the choices you get to make.
Valuable.
Valuable.
Started and stopped this book a few times. Wasn’t able to follow the recommendation to read a chapter and do the experiment once a week as if it was a course; I would get derailed and forget to set a particular time to listen each week. In the end I just listened to the book. It was still valuable. I still learned the best ways to improve willpower are to utilize: Self awareness, Self care, and Remembering what matters most.
One of the things I loved most about the book was how it covered the science on how our brain works and why we, as human beings, need instant gratification but how to control it so we don't sabotage our long-term goals. It contains ways to increase self control, that seem like common sense but teach the reader to pause before reacting to an impulse. I will certainly read this book again, but I am already changing how I make decisions.
I learned a few things from reading this book. But I found the presentation to be surprisingly boring. If I wanted a list of 101 willpower tips, I would have read a crappy Lifehacker post. This book had a lot of great things to say, it just said them very poorly. So I've composed an abridged version of the book that I personally think is much better than the actual book. I enjoyed a lot of the science behind it and that was fun to read, but the rest of the book gets fairly annoying fairly fast. So if you'd like to get smarter, skim the book instead or take a look at my summary.
- Your brain isn't going to be very strong if your body isn't.
- Willpower gets stronger the more you practice it.
- Trying to be good or "right" instead of focusing on our longer-term goals gives us permission to be bad. That's bad.
- Our brains mistake the promise of reward for a guarantee of happiness, so we chase satisfaction from things that do not deliver. Another bad idea.
- Guilt is not a positive emotion. Feeling bad leads to giving in.
- We don't perceive our future selves accurately.
- Willpower is contagious. In other words, don't hang around losers.
- Don't try to suppress thoughts and cravings. It doesn't work too well. Accept the thoughts, but don't act on them.
- Your brain isn't going to be very strong if your body isn't.
- Willpower gets stronger the more you practice it.
- Trying to be good or "right" instead of focusing on our longer-term goals gives us permission to be bad. That's bad.
- Our brains mistake the promise of reward for a guarantee of happiness, so we chase satisfaction from things that do not deliver. Another bad idea.
- Guilt is not a positive emotion. Feeling bad leads to giving in.
- We don't perceive our future selves accurately.
- Willpower is contagious. In other words, don't hang around losers.
- Don't try to suppress thoughts and cravings. It doesn't work too well. Accept the thoughts, but don't act on them.
Some interesting, scientifically-based thoughts on willpower, plus tips on what you can do to conquer your own "willpower challenge." Some of this stuff was intuitive (you have less willpower when you're tired or hungry, for instance, or surrounding yourself with people who are good examples instead of bad), but other parts were pretty enlightening. I liked the tips on "strengthening" your willpower muscle by making small, good choices, and how meditation might help (even if you are "bad" at meditating -- the process of redirecting your thoughts over and over again strengthens your willpower "muscle"). The discussion on dopamine, the pleasure-seeking hormone, was fascinating; I realized that those times I was mindlessly refreshing my Facebook feed, I was just like those rats in the experiment, on the verge of "happiness" but never feeling satisfied. I recognized the truth that "future me" isn't going to be magically less stressed, busy, or tired (so I shouldn't keep putting off the tasks that should be done today!). Reframing those daunting tasks into smaller, more manageable ones helps ("yes, I can have a cookie, but I have to wait ten minutes first"). And when it comes to thought control, trying NOT to think about something is sometimes the worst thing we can do to ourselves; instead, recognize the thought, but then dismiss it.
I did feel like there was almost an overwhelming amount of information, but maybe that's because I was reading the book faster than the recommended pace of one chapter per week.
And now that I've tried it, I don't think self-help is a good genre choice for audio books (all the attempts at humor felt flat) -- and it bothered me that the narrator was a man when the book was written by a woman. One star for the audio aspect; three stars for the book itself.
For those looking for clean reads: there is some mild swearing, plus enough references to controlling your sexuality as a willpower challenge to make me feel annoyed and uncomfortable in places. (I realize I am a bit of a prude, though, and I don't know if it would have bothered me as much if hadn't been for the audio format.)
I did feel like there was almost an overwhelming amount of information, but maybe that's because I was reading the book faster than the recommended pace of one chapter per week.
And now that I've tried it, I don't think self-help is a good genre choice for audio books (all the attempts at humor felt flat) -- and it bothered me that the narrator was a man when the book was written by a woman. One star for the audio aspect; three stars for the book itself.
For those looking for clean reads: there is some mild swearing, plus enough references to controlling your sexuality as a willpower challenge to make me feel annoyed and uncomfortable in places. (I realize I am a bit of a prude, though, and I don't know if it would have bothered me as much if hadn't been for the audio format.)