Scan barcode
nikixoxo's review
5.0
I honestly loved this memoir. I found it refreshing and honest, and incredibly well-written. I love everything that Doree has created in the past, and this book is no different. Would recommend for anyone who feels like their life is taking a meandering path, or they're constantly playing the comparison game. We all take different journeys and Doree celebrates that fact!
katieoyama's review against another edition
0.5
I bought this book without reading any reviews. The only reason I finished it was because it felt like a waste of my money to not.
I should start by saying that I don’t expect all memoirs to follow a format where the author connects their life experiences to data or studies. However, considering Doree Shafrir’s journalism background, I expected some sort of research on the increasing population of single women over the age of 30 and contributing societal factors.
Instead, the book was a fully isolated memoir with a couple purely opinion based references to society here and there. Fair enough. But even as a life-experience-only memoir, “Thanks for Waiting: The Joy (& Weirdness) of Being a Late Bloomer” is not good.
My biggest issue is the pacing. Shafrir goes from her childhood to college then largely skips over her 20s. Again, fair enough. This is a memoir about being a “late bloomer.” But the time jump left it feeling like there are large gaps of missing information. (For example: Several times during the first part of the book, she references dropping out of a PhD program in her 20s, but nowhere is there explanation of what happened, even though it clearly impacted her decision making several times.)
The first almost 130 pages are basically her detailing her dating and sexual exploits, along with some career-based spiraling. Which would be fine, but they’re all written with a voice that gives “I’m uncomfortable with how privileged my life has been thus far so I have to really ham up how bad things felt to get sympathy” vibes.
Then, she moves to LA and meets her now-husband. This whole section gave me narrative whiplash. Given the fact an on-again, off-again fuckboy “relationship” was given a full 18 pages, Shafrir went from matching with her husband on Tinder to being engaged and trying to get pregnant in only 27 pages. There’s very little about the development of their relationship. The most descriptive she gets about the relationship’s emotional development is: “The honeymoon phase of strolling around New York hand in hand may have been over, but there was still so much I loved about Matt.”
The next 91 pages detail her experience and frustrations with IVF. All of which are completely valid. IVF is a taxing and frustrating process. Eventually, Shafrir does have a successful pregnancy and the last 25 pages are about all her frustrations with motherhood and how everything didn’t just click into place and become magically easy once she had what she wanted.
Given the fact the title is “Thanks for Waiting: The JOYS (& Weirdness) of Being a Late Bloomer,” there is very little joy to be found in this book. Shafrir instead comes across as unlikable and lacking any sort of introspective ability. The only constant in the book is that she is dissatisfied with her lot in life, regardless of whether she gets what she wants or not. The most enjoyable part of this was the last page about the typeface used. It gave a nice 2 paragraph history on Garamond.
I should start by saying that I don’t expect all memoirs to follow a format where the author connects their life experiences to data or studies. However, considering Doree Shafrir’s journalism background, I expected some sort of research on the increasing population of single women over the age of 30 and contributing societal factors.
Instead, the book was a fully isolated memoir with a couple purely opinion based references to society here and there. Fair enough. But even as a life-experience-only memoir, “Thanks for Waiting: The Joy (& Weirdness) of Being a Late Bloomer” is not good.
My biggest issue is the pacing. Shafrir goes from her childhood to college then largely skips over her 20s. Again, fair enough. This is a memoir about being a “late bloomer.” But the time jump left it feeling like there are large gaps of missing information. (For example: Several times during the first part of the book, she references dropping out of a PhD program in her 20s, but nowhere is there explanation of what happened, even though it clearly impacted her decision making several times.)
The first almost 130 pages are basically her detailing her dating and sexual exploits, along with some career-based spiraling. Which would be fine, but they’re all written with a voice that gives “I’m uncomfortable with how privileged my life has been thus far so I have to really ham up how bad things felt to get sympathy” vibes.
Then, she moves to LA and meets her now-husband. This whole section gave me narrative whiplash. Given the fact an on-again, off-again fuckboy “relationship” was given a full 18 pages, Shafrir went from matching with her husband on Tinder to being engaged and trying to get pregnant in only 27 pages. There’s very little about the development of their relationship. The most descriptive she gets about the relationship’s emotional development is: “The honeymoon phase of strolling around New York hand in hand may have been over, but there was still so much I loved about Matt.”
The next 91 pages detail her experience and frustrations with IVF. All of which are completely valid. IVF is a taxing and frustrating process. Eventually, Shafrir does have a successful pregnancy and the last 25 pages are about all her frustrations with motherhood and how everything didn’t just click into place and become magically easy once she had what she wanted.
Given the fact the title is “Thanks for Waiting: The JOYS (& Weirdness) of Being a Late Bloomer,” there is very little joy to be found in this book. Shafrir instead comes across as unlikable and lacking any sort of introspective ability. The only constant in the book is that she is dissatisfied with her lot in life, regardless of whether she gets what she wants or not. The most enjoyable part of this was the last page about the typeface used. It gave a nice 2 paragraph history on Garamond.
andrearbooks's review against another edition
4.0
This is one of those books that just came into my life at the right time. I read this as someone who isn't a listener to the author's podcasts (but plan to be), so I knew nothing about her life coming into this. As someone who got married at 32 and had their first baby at 39, I connected with the timeline she shared. I also appreciated the honest and thorough reflections on her journey through infertility and motherhood. Having been through my own journey, there were pieces of her story I knew well. There were times I found myself moved to tears through the infertility pieces and I found myself laughing as she described the beginning of her motherhood. This was a beautiful reflection of one woman's journey to figure out where she can thrive and be unapologetically herself.
daniellebeverly's review against another edition
3.0
A breezy read that made me feel understood and relieved. I enjoyed Doree's talkative writing style, but it also lacked depth at times and I wish it had ended less abruptly. Overall, nothing ground breaking here, but if you need to sit on the couch and talk to a friend, this book does the job.
jenn_sveda's review against another edition
3.0
As someone who has been a late bloomer in just about every aspect of life, except academically, I really related to the first part of this book. Reading about Shafrir's fears that she had somehow "missed the memo" on how to live her life - which everyone around her seemed to be doing without issue - really resonated with me. However, I was disappointed that the book didn't go deeper. Shafrir often remarked that it was silly to be feeling inferior for having different experiences at different stages of life, but beyond that, the concept of being a "late bloomer" seemed underdeveloped. The last third or so of the book was dedicated almost exclusively to Shafrir's struggles with IVF, which isn't exclusive to geriatric pregnancies and is a topic in which I have no interest. There's something about a couple putting themselves into massive debt and invasive hormone therapy so they can have a "real" child (as opposed to adopted one of the thousands of children in the system) that really doesn't inspire much sympathy in me.
Shafrir also seemed to want to make some kind of grand feminist statement, which she did by disparaging other women in her life and making a podcast about skincare. I'm not entirely sure why she views herself as some kind of iconoclast, but her randomly inserted "because of the patriarchy!" comments seemed a little disconnected from the overall narrative of feeling behind in life. While it's true that our culture's patriarchal structure is what shapes the expectations that we should be hitting certain milestones (especially when it comes to romance, sex, and motherhood) at certain times, Shafrir rarely connected these ideas, instead complaining about the patriarchy in regards to its impact on the professional world moreso than on the personal world.
Overall, I found the first two thirds of this book reassuring - it's not just me that's still single well into my twenties, even if many of my friends and peers have gotten married by this point! - but the focus on the IVF process at the end of the book ultimately lost my interest and left me feeling like there wasn't a satisfying conclusion to the book. It doesn't feel like Shafrir ever fully accepted that her life didn't follow the path laid out by society's expectations; rather, she still did everything she could to conform to those expectations as quickly as possible.
Shafrir also seemed to want to make some kind of grand feminist statement, which she did by disparaging other women in her life and making a podcast about skincare. I'm not entirely sure why she views herself as some kind of iconoclast, but her randomly inserted "because of the patriarchy!" comments seemed a little disconnected from the overall narrative of feeling behind in life. While it's true that our culture's patriarchal structure is what shapes the expectations that we should be hitting certain milestones (especially when it comes to romance, sex, and motherhood) at certain times, Shafrir rarely connected these ideas, instead complaining about the patriarchy in regards to its impact on the professional world moreso than on the personal world.
Overall, I found the first two thirds of this book reassuring - it's not just me that's still single well into my twenties, even if many of my friends and peers have gotten married by this point! - but the focus on the IVF process at the end of the book ultimately lost my interest and left me feeling like there wasn't a satisfying conclusion to the book. It doesn't feel like Shafrir ever fully accepted that her life didn't follow the path laid out by society's expectations; rather, she still did everything she could to conform to those expectations as quickly as possible.
emilyinherhead's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
3.5
Reading Doree Shafrir’s story felt like listening to a good friend talk about her love life and career troubles. I was pulling for her the whole time, even when some of her choices—largely the ones involving men—started to get frustrating in their repetition. Just stop settling for dudes who clearly aren’t fully invested in the relationship! Choose someone who is choosing you back! It was a happy relief to read a satisfyingly hopeful ending, and I’m looking forward to reading more from her in the future.
erin832's review against another edition
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
3.5
greatexpectations77's review
lighthearted
relaxing
medium-paced
3.5
I liked the first half of this book more than the second. The author's infertility journey was kind of interesting, but I didn't feel like it was what I signed on for when picking up the book. I think I expected more encouragement about being a late bloomer, but maybe that was an unfair expectation from a memoir.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical content and Infertility
Moderate: Toxic relationship, Miscarriage, and Pregnancy
Minor: Alcohol