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shubbard116's review against another edition
4.0
This was a very interesting read that I did a book report on in grad school. By no means written by a Christian, however it was interesting to see how a nonbeliever came to congruent conclusions of sexual health to the Christian faith.
juliarziegler's review against another edition
2.0
To be clear, I did not finish this book. I tried, trust me. I got over halfway through (page 160 to be exact). I started this book in the first place because of the wonderful praise I’d heard of it. So I guess I was thoroughly disappointed when it absolutely sucked.
Here’s the deal: I should have been a little more suspicious when the author was a white middle-upper class mom. And let me clarify, my mom is too, I’m not saying they are all inherently lacking nuance or understanding of intersectional feminism….and yet.
At about 20 pages in, Orenstein started bashing Miley Cyrus…I think that’s when I started to be like hmmm okay? Her tone continued into condescension as she interviewed young woman (mainly white/mainly straight/majnly cis). She talked about sex in exactly the way she shouldn’t be talking about sex, ESPECIALLY TO YOUNG WOMEN. I felt awful for the women she interviewed; I could literally imagine the looks of disapproval she gave them.
Do not read this. Literally read any other book about girls and sex. Maybe not any other but just don’t choose this one.
Here’s the deal: I should have been a little more suspicious when the author was a white middle-upper class mom. And let me clarify, my mom is too, I’m not saying they are all inherently lacking nuance or understanding of intersectional feminism….and yet.
At about 20 pages in, Orenstein started bashing Miley Cyrus…I think that’s when I started to be like hmmm okay? Her tone continued into condescension as she interviewed young woman (mainly white/mainly straight/majnly cis). She talked about sex in exactly the way she shouldn’t be talking about sex, ESPECIALLY TO YOUNG WOMEN. I felt awful for the women she interviewed; I could literally imagine the looks of disapproval she gave them.
Do not read this. Literally read any other book about girls and sex. Maybe not any other but just don’t choose this one.
roxymaybe's review against another edition
2.0
Incredibly shallow, I guess a good intro for people who have literally never thought critically about American Pie or whatever. We have enough books telling girls it's okay to say No and warning parents about frat parties. I'm still waiting for literally anyone to write about young women who WANT to have sex - and actually want to, not some gotcha about girls who think they want to but are being tricked by The Patriarchy. I can't believe this was written in 2016 and not 1996.
bookph1le's review against another edition
5.0
This is an utterly outstanding book that made me think a lot about how I want to talk to my own kids about sex. I can't recommend it highly enough. Orenstein covers so many topics critical to raising healthy--both physically and emotionally--children. This book is so critical precisely because it covers the things about which Americans are so squeamish, but we need to stop fooling ourselves. Failing to raise our children with healthy views of their own sexuality has dire consequences for public health and for our children themselves. This book may make you squirm at times, and I can pretty much guarantee it will horrify you, but there is no overstating how crucial it is to let that sense of horror propel us into substantive action. Though this book focuses mainly on girls, it is a must-read for men as well, especially parents of boys.
jenhurst's review against another edition
2.0
I did not like this at all.
A few of my issues:
1.) every girl she talked to had an issue with the guys they were with watching porn. A lot of girls don’t care, because virtually every guy watches porn. There is an issue with men having porn addictions and expecting things because of porn, but it only mentions the women’s insecurities surrounding it. Men also have insecurities from porn about not lasting longer enough or having a big enough dick. I wish that they would’ve addressed this as well.
2.) I felt like it didn’t go enough into the empowerment of women knowing what they want and masturbation. It touched on the fact women who masterbate have better sex/more orgasms but I think “Pleasure Activism” did a much more empowering and better way of presenting it.
3.) the whole section of how girls always are giving around giving guys blow jobs reminded me of the scare campaign involving rainbow parties. Yes oral sex is very common and lots of women do that instead of having sex. It can start young. But the way it was presented as like all all the girls were doing it all the time annoyed me. The girls said they couldn’t hang out with guys alone because they all expected a blow job. Yes, there are guys who are like that. They are assholes. They’re not guys me or my girl friends want to be friends with. I have never had a close guy friend with that I wouldn’t hang out one on one with and I can tell you he didn’t expect a blow job when we did. I felt like the way the book portrayed men was like they were all the assholes. Not true, there’s plenty of good men who won’t ask for blow jobs when you hang out with them, spend the whole time pressuring you and won’t wait for you to get drunk to have sex. I’ve been the drunk girl and they’re either hand me off to one of the girls I came with or make sure I get home safely, etc. They are guys who will take advantage of girls, but there’s just as many who do look out for girls and want to make sure their okay. I wish the book would’ve shown men in a more positive light as well.
A few of my issues:
1.) every girl she talked to had an issue with the guys they were with watching porn. A lot of girls don’t care, because virtually every guy watches porn. There is an issue with men having porn addictions and expecting things because of porn, but it only mentions the women’s insecurities surrounding it. Men also have insecurities from porn about not lasting longer enough or having a big enough dick. I wish that they would’ve addressed this as well.
2.) I felt like it didn’t go enough into the empowerment of women knowing what they want and masturbation. It touched on the fact women who masterbate have better sex/more orgasms but I think “Pleasure Activism” did a much more empowering and better way of presenting it.
3.) the whole section of how girls always are giving around giving guys blow jobs reminded me of the scare campaign involving rainbow parties. Yes oral sex is very common and lots of women do that instead of having sex. It can start young. But the way it was presented as like all all the girls were doing it all the time annoyed me. The girls said they couldn’t hang out with guys alone because they all expected a blow job. Yes, there are guys who are like that. They are assholes. They’re not guys me or my girl friends want to be friends with. I have never had a close guy friend with that I wouldn’t hang out one on one with and I can tell you he didn’t expect a blow job when we did. I felt like the way the book portrayed men was like they were all the assholes. Not true, there’s plenty of good men who won’t ask for blow jobs when you hang out with them, spend the whole time pressuring you and won’t wait for you to get drunk to have sex. I’ve been the drunk girl and they’re either hand me off to one of the girls I came with or make sure I get home safely, etc. They are guys who will take advantage of girls, but there’s just as many who do look out for girls and want to make sure their okay. I wish the book would’ve shown men in a more positive light as well.
_karinaiello_'s review against another edition
informative
fast-paced
3.0
I think the point of the book was good and important and may have been more impactful for others who are maybe coming out of a more conservative mindset/lifestyle. For me, I skimmed a lot because it was just rehashing a lot of stories and statistics I am already aware of. I don't honestly feel like I learned anything I didn't already know or experience.
The author allows too much of her own bias in from chapter one. There is some transphobia in chapter 5 and xenophobia in chapter 6. Nothing "big" just a couple of comments that honestly could have been edited out and wouldn't have affected the book at all.
The author allows too much of her own bias in from chapter one. There is some transphobia in chapter 5 and xenophobia in chapter 6. Nothing "big" just a couple of comments that honestly could have been edited out and wouldn't have affected the book at all.